I’m the sole provider for our family now. Officially.
I posted a single political link out of a dozen cute and fluffy links in last Friday’s Honor Roll, and it got people all riled up. One person was so incensed that she tried to insult me personally, calling me out for enjoying my “fancy shopping trips” while Brandon was collecting unemployment. That’s not true, but I hadn’t realized the misconception I may have been fostering by not providing an update sooner. It’s hard stuff to write about and I’d been putting it off, but no longer. Here’s what’s going on with us.
Brandon and I met in 1999, when we each worked full-time at Barbara’s Bookstore in Oak Park (making just over $6/hour in the beginning — go us!). We began dating in 2001, moved in together a while after that, and were married in May of 2004. Just before we were married, Brandon left the bookstore for a job in printing that paid more. He was there until he lost his job in January.
I left the bookstore in late 2004. I had already been working a second job which was to continue for a little longer, and I took a seasonal retail job at the first west elm store. When that was over, I decided to pursue my dream of owning a stationery business and I started Pink Loves Brown. I also took on freelance web design projects as Smart & Lovely while the stationery business took off. I started this blog in 2007, and I realized that the blog would eclipse the stationery shop a couple of years into it. The money I made from advertising was a nice bonus at first, and eventually it became enough to call the blog “a job” with a straight face.
Brandon liked the work that he was doing (managing prepress), but the environment was a bad one. We’d always hoped that he could quit eventually, but it helped support our family and provided health insurance. When he unexpectedly lost his job earlier this year, he was on unemployment for a few months while he looked for work. As I took on more projects though, it became clear that we could make it work if he wanted to be a stay-at-home dad. In July, he stopped collecting unemployment. We got rid of COBRA and bought our own health insurance (which was difficult and expensive). It’s scary to be the sole supporter since I have such a non-traditional job, but it’s working right now. If we need to reevaluate in the future, we will.
I make money in advertising and sponsored posts here on Making it Lovely, and I also write for Babble, Better Homes and Gardens, and Glidden. I’m saying yes to a lot more work than I would have before and I’m working a lot, but we’re doing well. Last year was the first year in which I earned more than my husband. This year I’ve been doing even better, and I hope to eventually be able to replace his lost income.
It wasn’t under ideal circumstances, but it seems I’ve managed to cross another item off of my Lovely Life List. A big one.
Thank you, everybody, for all of your support over the years. Especially recently. We wouldn’t be able to do this without you, and I’m humbled by you and grateful.
Comments
393 responses to “Breadwinning”
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Good for you & your family! I think the naysayers are jealous & how you spend your money is your business & no one else’s. Making the transition to being a family with a stay at home parent is a hard one. Especially when it happens against your own choice. I’m so happy that it’s all working out. Your blog has never been more enjoyable!
You go girl.:) You deserve all you get because you are truly talented. You have a goods eye; I know I’ve copied a few of your ideas.
Keep up the great work.
Kia
Oops i meant good eye.
I really don’t feel like you owe anyone an explanation. Internet folks expect way too much out of people they don’t know. There’s this weird hint of ownership sometimes with blog readers, twitter followers, etc.–forgetting completely that although we enjoy your content, we don’t have the right to curate that content or become abusive if you post things we don’t like.
Well done, Nicole! Dreams can come true with belief and hard work, even during scary uncertin times.
We’re working on a few of our own right now.
Your voice remains authentic even as you’ve taken on more sponsored content — and that is rare in the blogging world. I’m really glad your work supports your family, and appreciate your honesty and transparency about it all. Wishing you even more success down the road. :)
I rarely post a comment. That said . . . you go girl. I subscribe to the belief of live and let live. I may not agree with others’ views on a lot of things but would never insult another person.
Seconding Janet. You’re an inspiring lady of excellent taste, and entirely deserving of every bit of success that’s come your way. I’d be bankrupt by now if I lived in the US, from buying every single thing in your monthly style posts!
You are an amazing and strong woman, and an inspiration. Thank you!! (I also agree that you do not owe us any explanation… for goodness sake we are exposed to your talents, advice, wit, coolness, etc etc etc etc for FREE!)
My first when I read this post was that you don’t owe anyone an explanation for how you live your life. I still think that’s true, but by the end of the post I thought how lovely it is that you choose to share your story as inspiration!
I was secretly hoping you might find a way for it to work with you both at home, because selfishly I figured this would mean more blog content…
I’m mainly just very happy for you both that you’re no longer in the situation of looking for work in this bad climate though.
I’m sure it takes A LOT of work to keep this blog up and running, so well done you!
Girl Let me just say you’re the cherry on my sundae. Seriously ignore the people who think anything negative. Who cares if you’re fantasy shopping? I do it daily…along with fantasy cleaning, bill paying, & gourmet food eating haha. Keep embracing what YOU want on YOUR blog! People are crazy and when they sometimes hate on me on my blog (alittleglassbox.com) i Just know that what I am doing is right and it fuels me to do even better. Congrats on supporting your family…that’s huge! Now go get awesome with yo’ bad self!
As the primary breadwinner in our family too (but in a more traditional job) I still struggle with the stress of being the sole supporter, but it gets easier every day with every small victory. You keep doing what you are doing, you are doing awesome!
We support you 100%! I do appreciate the update. I was wondering what was going on…. I’ve been trying to click on sponsor links of yours more, hoping it provides some help and additional $$! Lol!
Love personal posts from you. It’s the icing on top of the MIL cake!
xo, emily
Nicole, I am truly inspired and impressed that you are willing to put you and your family’s experiences “out there” and still gracefully brush them haters off. I think that your accomplishments speak for themselves and anyone who has the audacity to criticize needs to step back and do some crucial self-examination. Thank you for being honest and contemplative and managing to find the positive message in our lives and challenges.
Haters gonna hate, Nicole, and there ain’t nothing to hate about you ;).
Hi Nicole. I’ve been a longtime fan of your blog (and your work in general) but have been more of a lurker rather than an engaged commenter. I’d like to give you a big hug for writing this post and for being brave and open enough to share your story. I agree with Candice in that I don’t think you owe anyone an explanation, but it’s nice to be able to keep up with your life so I can send good thoughts your way. It sounds like you have the financial and practical bases covered (insurance, etc.) — that, plus the support of your beautiful and loving family, gives you the foundation you need to continue to grow your business. I wish you all the best and will be cheering you on through the power of the interwebz. Thanks again for sharing, Nicole.
I’m so amazed at all you’re accomplishing. I know the stress of having your husband unemployed and not exactly knowing what will happen next. It was definitely character-building for us, that’s for sure!
Hang in there and big fat boo hiss to nasty commenters. Geez!
I have never thought to even ask, it is your life, your blog and your views, which I read because you are interesting, fascinating and well spoken. You owe no explanation.
Nicole, I recently left my secure corporate job to because a full time photographer. Was it scary? Yes. Was it worth doing what I love with energy and enthusiasm? Yes. Good for you to be able to create a non-traditional job for yourself in a difficult economic climate. You are one of the handful of women that inspires me from the sea of bloggers out there. You are unique and special, I understand why you felt the need to explain yourself, but honestly I read your blog for the amazing content, not to judge your personal life, and I am sorry that you have had that experience with other readers. I know you have enough old-fashioned moxie to be successful at whatever you put your mind to. You are lovely :)
Yes, naysayers be damned. I’ve seen people get angry when bloggers become more and more successful. People seemed to attack the hell out of poor Grace from DesignSponge once her book came out because she was able to get an expensive bottle of NAIL polish. I LOVE hearing about you and your family, and I’m MEGA impressed that you’re the sole breadwinner. Keep up the good work!
Yes, I remember that d*s post. (And thanks.)
Congrats to you. I just want to say that I feel our publications must have editorial content or they are worthless, not to mention boring. Whether you as a blogger share your opinion on a color palette, a brand of kid’s shoes or something as important as equal pay for equal work, it is your opinions that bring us to your blog. I hope this experience of backlash from Friday does not quiet your voice on important issues outside of design once in awhile.
In the immortal words of a drag queen I once met “YOU DO YOU!” You owe people nothing that aren’t supporting, uplifting or inspiring your life or work. How two responsible and loving people and parents raise their family is solely your business, especially in light of how much you DO share. Never let the voice of a naysayer guide your path. Congrats and keep it lovely :)
I loved that link! How wonderful for your family to have a parent at home with the kids while you work your non-trad job! Sounds like you guys have a great bond.
Good for you! And good for us, too–we benefit because you’ve made this work. So awesome. And what a great family you have!
You are inspiring and I am truly happy for you and your family! Congratulations on this very impressive life list item :)
Congratulations on making the situation work for your family. In the end, all that matters is what works for your family, not others.
Bravo, Nicole! Don’t let anyone tear you down. I have read your blogs for years, before you had your sweet kiddos! People judge and will continue to do so but at the end of the day, it doesn’t matter. I love your site! Providing for your family is so essential and amazing… I am awe-struck by your talent. Futhermore, I enjoy your fluff post, all your posts and will continue to do so in the future because I love your voice, creativeness, and integrity. It’s a shame people feel the need to tear others down.
I rarely ever comment, and I really should because your blog one of my all time favorites, but I just wanted to tell you how inspiring and encouraging it is to read your story. I love that you guys have been able to find what works best for your situation and it’s disheartening to hear that the blog world threw out some insensitive comments to you. But way to go on keeping it positive and sharing your story. :)
Wow! Great work! Your blog is always constistantly awesome. I was really happy for you when you started getting sponsored posts. Congrats to you and your family on figuring out a way to make it work!
I think it is awesome that you can do what you love and with your talent and hard work are able to support your family! Other people, and women especially, should be more supportive of the success and independence of creative women out there.
No one ever asks me how much money I or my husband make, how much I contribute to our household, or how much money I spend when I go shopping, yet they feel totally comfortable commenting on your personal life/money here — it is so bizaare!
And the comments about what topics you should stick to on your blog… it is your personal blog. Yes, you tend to write about design and style but at the end of the day this is your personal, self driven blog and you should feel comfortable posting what you want. People can freely choose to click on a link or ignore it. If they want to discuss the topic you linked to with a dissenting opinion that is one thing, but to personally attack you is ridiculous.
Keep on keeping on girl- I, personally, very much enjoy your content and enjoy seeing what you write about!
When I read your post last week and saw the political link, I knew it would “rile” people. I have to admit I was surprised (but happy) it was included. It is unfortunate that things have gotten so divisive that people can’t post an opinion without being attacked. Congrats on the success of your blog and for being the breadwinner. Good for you and keep up the fantastic work!!!!
I don’t think you should need to justify yourself or your families lifestyle choices to anyone, but bravo, it sounds like you are becoming a very successful business yourself. :) You should be proud, and it’s fantastic that you can support your family doing what you love!! As someone who is working toward (hopefully) a freelance career in art, I understand that it’s not easy to make it, so congrats for making it! ;)
Nicole, can you explain how advertising works? I read your blog regularly, in my RSS reader. I rarely click on advertisements, partly because I don’t see them. I’d love to support you, and if that meant clicking through to your site and visiting a few sponsor links I’d be more than happy to do that. I think you do a great job of integrating sponsored content and I don’t mind it at all. I hope everything works out for you and your lovely family!
There are a lot of different types of ads out there, but the way they work for me is by page views, not clicks. So the more people I have visiting my site each month, the more page views I would have, and the more ad revenue I would bring in. It’s the reason so many blogs like to rely on slideshows (they help tremendously with page views), but that’s not my thing.
I agree with all the support offered by previous commenters. What is ideal anyway? I say, whatever works for your family. I’ve learned that that evolves and it is best to be open to new ideas, ideals and opportunities.
This might seem like a silly addendum–but have you ever considered unloading your old clothing/accessories on a website like Copious? I love your style and it would be nice to see someone on that site that’s not a size 2.
I hadn’t heard of that site before! I tend to pass my clothes down to my mom and my sister when I’m done with them though. They’re always happy to come and raid my closet, and then I donate the rest.
I really enjoy visiting your blog daily and I’m so glad to see the success you are having, Nicole. It’s such good news that you are able to live a happy life, doing work you enjoy and paying the bills. Keep up the good work, and I’ll keep enjoying seeing your stuff around! :)
Haters be damned.
Congratulations on making a dream a great effort and providing for your family. Ignore the negative since that only slows you down. Creativity always dreams higher and you made it right. This is actually the first post I read from your blog but I think it is very commendable to maintain a blog, since I just started as well a few months ago. It requires discipline and a good mind.
I support you and your blog and your decisions 100%. It’s your blog to do with what you will and I for one will continue to read and enjoy it. There will always be trolls on the internet so just ignore them. Sticks and stones…
You should be proud that you’ve built something from the ground up that supports your family. That is what America is all about! I’m sure that a lot of readers disagree with your political views, but that’s beside the point. THAT’S what America is all about, too. I’ve been reading for many years, and I love your ideas and all the little links you alert us to. Keep it up!
Girl you don’t have to explain yourself to ANYONE! There are some really nasty people out there…I learned this by reading comments to onine news articles. LOL. People will say some terrible things.
You have an adorable blog and an adorable family…keep on keepin’ on!
I must have missed the political link. I’m happy for the update though, because we’re in a similar situation. Though I’m only making pennies with my blog, I am making concentrated efforts to increase my ‘bread winning power’ while my husband is out of work – and has taken on all the house husband duties I used to handle.
It’s nerve wracking… and hard to post about. I try, but I fear nothing brings out the judge-brigade like people prioritizing your spending for you.
I’m glad things are working for you guys, it gives me some hope that this is possible, and that we maybe won’t be spending our anniversary in a cardboard box. :)
Good for you! You shouldn’t feel that you have to justify yourself in terms of how you make money, and how you spend it. Your blog speaks for itself, and you definitely do not come across as frivolous or flighty. Don’t let mean people throw you off course.
[Pat on the back]Great job, Nicole! That’s a huge accomplishment. Sadly, there will always be hateful people who love to hurl nasty comments, especially at those who obviously work hard for what they have. Cheers to your bravery and dedicated spirit!
I hear you on this one and am sending you lots of good vibes on striking a balance between earning and feeling responsible for, well, everything, and everything else. I struggled a lot with this this summer (way, way too much work) and am FINALLY feeling the tides shifting a little. xo
Thank you for the update (which I agree with other comments that you didn’t owe us). I’ve been following your blog for a while and it is one of a handful of blogs that has gotten me thinking about starting my own blog as a creative outlet. Maybe someday it will allow me to officially become a recovering lobbyist instead of thinking about becoming one. Congratulations on crossing this off your life list.
I loved the link, because it’s awesome and I didn’t know about it, but also because you had the guts to put it up. Too many bloggers pretend there isn’t even an election happening, especially such an important one, because they’re worried about the reactions of crazy people. We won’t all agree, but it’s important to TALK about things, which is the problem with our country of late. Anyway, kudos to you!
In short, Nicole, you got this. ;-)
Like everyone alluded to, people are always going to look for inappropriate ways to project their self-esteem issues onto you. The fact of the matter is that in the internet age, people think they somehow have the right to inquire about your financial situations and your home life. Can you imagine walking up to a perfect stranger and asking them this kind of information? How terribly uncouth!
In any case, I love you for this post and every other post. I know it’s easier said than done, but do not let the turkeys get you down.
Congratulations, Nicole! It’s so weird what people think about bloggers sometimes. Uncle Beefy and I have laughed about it. “We’re all rich and fancy!” Like it’s all so easy. It takes SO much work and SO much courage to do the things that you’ve done. Even though you hadn’t planned on how it’s gone with Brandon’s job, YOU DID IT. And that’s awesome. xoxo
Hi Nicole,
As a mother/freelance designer/health insurance worrier, I know just how tough it can be. it is amazing and awesome that you are making it work, and well enough to support your whole family at that! I am insulted on your behalf, that anyone would question your personal finances, or whether it was appropriate for you to be shopping, that is just absurd! I love what you do, your eye for style, and I appreciate that you share so much of your personal life. Congratulations and good luck to you and your family (not that you need it)!
As a long time reader of your blog, I truly admire your ability to maintain a positive outlook and find creativity in the unexpected changes in your working life and the subsequent need for financial survival as a family. It’s usually obvious that when people promote products in blog posts there might be some reason behind it ie payment. Whatevs. It’s easy as a reader to either ignore them or enjoy them. To me bloggers who earn money have found the most wonderful way to be a copy-writer, marketing exec, photographer and stylist. Yay you. And “phhtttt” to anyone who says otherwise.
Bravo! Bravo! Your success has come by no accident. Through focus and hard work you have been able to accomplish this goal. Congratulations!
Plus, kudos to Brandon! There are still a lot of men who would struggle with the non-traditional role of stay-home-dad.
JUST KEEP SWIMMING!
Nicole, I’m so happy for you! You are so inspiring and your transparency on your blog makes you so likable. I’ve been following you for two years now and while I don’t comment often, I read every post. You really do make things lovely. Congratulations on your accomplishments. I will keep reading and rooting for you!
First of all, I liked that political link. :)
Second of all, I really feel that you don’t owe anybody an explanation about your personal life. Anybody who feels otherwise is expecting way too much of you.
Third of all, congratulations on achieving your goal. That truely is something to be proud of!
Nicole, you’re an inspiration! It’s not easy but you’re doing it. And nothing wrong with sharing your political beliefs. It made me like you even more :)
I hate that you even had to write this post. People are dumb, sometimes. But I’ll second the “Bravo!” Being the breadwinner is a huge responsibility, and it’s so great that you can do it!
Nicole, I read your blog pretty much every day and enjoy it very much. I’ve never posted a comment before because I prefer to snoop in the background, but on this I do feel I should say something. GOOD FOR YOU FOR POSTING SOMETHING POLITICAL. Why should anyone care whether or not you do so? There’s this little thing in our country called FREEDOM OF SPEECH, which apparently some people feel is less important than alliance to political party. I happen to agree with you on the politics of what you posted, but even if I didn’t, I would wholeheartedly support your right to post about whatever the heck you please. You don’t need to explain yourself to anyone and the haters can go hate somewhere else. It shouldn’t matter what your politics are to enjoy this blog.
Beautifully written. You are lovely and an inspiration to many of us women who love reading your posts.
Congratulations, I’m so happy for you and your family! You’re doing what works for you and that’s fantastic! Screw the haters, this is your blog and your business and it’s up to you how you want to run them both!
You should never have to justify your choices to a stranger (especially a rude and vindictive one) but I appreciate how willing you are to share personal experiences with your readers. It’s one of the reasons I enjoy your blog so much. Keep on truckin’!
Another lurker who enjoys your blog, feeling compelled to comment this time. Ignore the haters! I read your blog, and others, to see the world from another perspective, whether the topic be design, fashion or heaven forbid, politics. What is a blog without opinions! Your courage, strength and unique voice are an inspiration.
I’m so excited for you and your family. Way to go! (I’m also pretty proud and inspired by the way you handled this post. Your honesty and directness aren’t lost on me. Much respect! xoxo)
One day, I hope to provide enough for our family so my husband can be a stay at home dad. Thanks for the non-design, non-fashion inspiration!
Just want to say that your time and energy as well as the background cost (domain, servers) you put into this site are appreciated. I don’t know why people expect women to do all the work that goes into a popular blog for free. I also enjoy your Babble post so I click through to read them. I didn’t read the political link because I’d rather read about fashion and design. I respect your right to post it and as with all things online if I’m not interested I won’t read it.
Nicole, GO YOU. You are working hard and supporting your family. If anyone gives you grief about that, send them to me :) xoxo
Hooray!!!!
Not that you owe anyone an explanation, but I find the mechanics of household income and expenses very interesting, especially since I am slowly learning to better manage my own.
Thank you and Congratulations again!
Nicole, just delurking to say that I think you are incredibly generous to defend something to a few that needed no defense. Either way, congratulations on achieving something on your life list. I will continue to read, and enjoy, the full spectrum of what you post.
Whoo Hoo! Good for you and way to respond to negative comments with grace.
I just have to say, I’m so grateful for all that you share here. Sure, it’s part of your job to blog, but part of the beauty of that is that you get to decide what you “owe” your audience. Those are tough decisions to make and you seem to make them with grace. When I think of your blog I think of beauty and thoughtfulness- two things that are often juxtaposed but which you weave together seamlessly.
He EARNED his unemployment and you guys are entitled to live your lives as normally as possible while he received it. It drives me nuts when people transpose unemployment with welfare. Ugh, sorry that people are crazy.
Hear hear. Well put. And correct. There is no shame in collecting unemployment. It’s like what: if you’re in a car accident you should refuse to have your car repaired or get medical help, right?
Nicole,
I celebrate in yours and Brandon’s success in making it lovely to allow Brandon to be a stay at home dad! I wish you continued success and look forward to reading your blog, your family is inspirational
.
Xx
Callie
I am so happy for you, on a million levels. Your bravery, tenacity, SUCCESS, working from home with your two kids, giving your kids a stay-at-home parent, plus all your other amazing talents.
Nicole,
Today’s post made me angry – not at you, but at the ignorant people who made you feel like you have to explain yourself. I LOVED the political post earlier this week (I’m a Massachusetts Liberal. Gasp!). Just because your blog is primarily about design doesn’t mean you aren’t entitled to talk politics whenever you like, especially since we live in a time when your rights, mine, and our daughters’ are especilly under attack. All the pretty things in the world won’t change that. Only getting active and making a case for what we believe in will.
Beyond that, workers are entitled to unemployment benefits. You don’t have to feel humble or embarassed or shameful for using benefits that you (in this case, your husband) are entitled to. All this talk about the 47% “victim” class is typical right wing blabber aimed at driving a wedge between people and making them vote against their own interests for fear of being lumped in with the imaginary people who get rich off of public assistance. And it sounds like some of your readers eat that offensive nonsense up.
If there is a lesson in this, I happen to think it’s this: people like it when women keep their mouths shut about important issues and it’s incredibly important that we do just the opposite! Good for you.
It’s so easy to criticize people when you can just type some rude comments and hit send and not have to deliver your words face-to-face. I get worked up all the time but I have found that pausing and rethinking my words make a big difference in what I actually submit. Even typing it out and then deleting it can get your frustrations out- like journaling. Good for you and your family for making it work and being creative and open-minded about making a living. I love your style and approach to life and family and work. You are amazing!
I’m emerging from lurk mode as well to say you handled this situation in such a classy (and well-written) way. I agree with others that you shouldn’t have had to share such personal stuff in response to a loose cannon but you certainly took the graceful route. Good for you! And of course, it should go without saying that your blog is yours to use in whatever way you choose — that’s one of the benefits of self-employment. I appreciated that you took the risk of posting a political link. Keep up the great work, Nicole. Reading your blog is one of the fun parts of my day.
Good for you Nicole!! You’re such an inspiration. Your family must be so proud of you! Don’t let the mean people pull you down.
good for you! i thought it was actually refreshing that you included a political link in your round-up.
Congratulations! I think this is awesome. And the feminist I am, I am so happy that blogs can now provide (mostly) women with the avenues to care for themselves and her family. Way to go!
I’m a long-time reader and I was wondering how you guys were doing since we heard the news that you were becoming a one income household. Thanks for the update, and I’m really glad to hear you are doing well!
This is one of my very favorite blogs, and I really appreciate the opportunity to read it every day. You are a few life-steps ahead of me, and I really like having this daily inspiration as I look forward to getting married, buying a house, and having children of my own.
Congratulations- this is a big deal! This is the dream I have for my family, too.
Congratulations! I find your story very inspiring, and I share your goal of one day being able to support my family with a non-traditional career.
Oh, you tell that commenter you referenced to . . . . quietly hold his or her tongue. Unemployment INSURANCE is just that – it’s insurance. Meaning you’re paying for it in every paycheck through a regular job. So your husband was paying into the system and then when he needed it, filing a claim. It’s not money-for-nothing. There is no shame in taking it. It isn’t charity.
I’m glad you’re able to make things work out. I’m also the sole-breadwinner. Forging this new path in family life isn’t easy in our culture. Best to you and your family.
You should not have to apologize for the choices you and your family make. Congratulations on all you have achieved. I am a big fan!
You should be so extremely proud of yourself for being able to make it work in a difficult situation. I don’t really know how people on the internet feel so justified making the accusations that you mentioned about someone they do not know at all (besides what you choose to share online), but you have nothing to prove to them.
Hi Nicole
I’ve been a reader for years and love your blog. I don’t share your political views but am never opposed to reading intelligent commentary that might pursued me differently. Please continue to use your platform for whatever inspires you. I’m just grateful be along for the ride.
Wow, you are inspiring! Don’t let someone’s rudeness get to you–I think it’s awesome you’ve found a non-traditional way to support your family. And being able to do awesome things you love to do it–icing on the cake! For a non-polarizing “political link” check out Kid President http://kidpresident.com/.
I’m also a long time reader and I’ve never commented, but I feel bad that anyone felt the need to try to knock you down. I’ve been following you through decorating your apartment, buying a house and decorating each room, having 2 beautiful children and everything wonderful that you’ve shared with us in between. What I’ve learned from you and your blog is shown in my own home and I thank you for all that inspiration. I honestly love when I see a new post to read on my facebook wall, it’s a little time away from daily life to look at something beautiful. You’re really good at what you do and that’s why your successful and there will always be haters. But those haters can’t take away your success or what you’re showing your children about dreams, being strong and brave enough to follow those dreams. I think you kick ass!!!
I have to be honest, I wasn’t crazy about the Obama link last week. I opened it, considered each of the statements in order to decide if clicking would enlighten or upset me. For the most part I didn’t click on- my opinions are pretty well set. However, I appreciate that you asked people (me) to think and that, more than anything, is what we all need to do over the next month and a half.
I also appreciate your post today- your honesty and disclosure help us to understand more about you and your perspective. I am so very happy that this blog has been successful for you. I have made purchases from Pink Love Brown in the past but have gained much more from you in the last few years in free advice. Thanks for giving me reasons to come back week after week and good luck in the coming years!
Nicole, I think you’re rad. Good for you for supporting your family and continuing to publish such an interesting, inspirational blog. The rude comment you alluded to was just that—a rude, anonymous post from an internet troll. If anything, she diminished herself and her party with an ignorant response to your innocent post. I wish you the best of luck.
While I am of a different political persuasion, I respect your right to say what you want to say on your blog. I didn’t think it was over the top or offensive in any way. Congratulations on your success and I hope your husband is enjoying his increased time with the kiddos! By the way, I liked your curtain options for the kitchen, but I loved the countertop you were standing on. Now if I can convince the hubby…
I can’t believe someone felt it was OK to say that to you. Obviously they have some personal problems that they need to be working out on their own. Plus it’s your blog. You have a right to say or share whatever you want. If they don’t want to read it, they don’t have to.
Congratulations on being in a place to support your own family. As the primary breadwinner for my own family, I can appreciate how much pressure that brings. The nontraditional side of it just heaps that much more on it. I think you’re a fabulous writer, and I’m glad that you’re able to make it work!
In my opinion, what separates a great blog from a good one is one in which the writer is able to share personal information so we feel a sense of connection. I want to see the fun products, projects, and ideas, but I also want to know what type of person came up with them and find tid-bits of information I can relate to. Well done for being transparent with your life and family – makes me enjoy your blog even more:)
Awww, Nicole! That was soo touching. I follow your blog for two years now and I feel like I know your family as if you’re some friends (you’re such sweeties!!!). I was the sole provider for my family, too, while hubby was still at the university.
Unfortunately I worked harder every day because I thought I wasn’t doing enough yet. In April I had a complete breakdown, with my workload being too much, my mom and dad being ill very seriously (daddy probably won’t make it, we pray for him every day. he had another heart attack today, the second in only a month :'(), my hubby working for his diploma thesis and everything on my shoulders to carry.
It still is a very hard time and, honestly speaking, without the medication I take these days, I wouldn’t have made it.
Therefore, please, please, please never let anyone judge you! They’re not walking in your shoes. And take some time for yourself as well, life isn’t all about working. You’re worth it!
All the best wishes,
you and your family are amazing!
XO
Yip
People who work at regular salary jobs have part of that salary taken away for Unemployment. If we lose those jobs we have every right to collect unemployment no matter how much we have saved up or our spouse makes or whatever. We worked and therefore we deserve to collect unemployment. Maybe this person doesn’t know the difference between unemployment and welfare. They are very different. But regardless it is none of their business anyways.
Congrats for building a successful business on your own and to your husband for being secure enough to take time for his family! Kuddos!
I really appreciate this post. The truth is, the more honest you are about yourself and your circumstances (not that you were ever deceiving), the more I adore you and your blog. I feel very much akin to you and your family. I would love to be able to support my family with my blog. You are an inspiration to us all. As for the political post, I was on board, but then again, I agree with your views. I can understand some taking offense. Politics are a scary topic these days. Keep up the great work and congratulations to you and your family!
rock on!
I’m sorry that your had to come out and defend yourself but your post is super inspiring to newbie bloggers like me. Congratulations on your hard won success!
Hi Nicole, I have read your blog for quite some time now. I find it sad that you have to feel that you have to justify yourself, your family income or anything for that matter to a complete stranger who had an issue about something that you wrote on your own blog. I, like so many others, love your blog, we love reading it, so keep up the good work and worry less about someone who is so bitter about their own life they feel they need to lash out about someone elses.
I love reading your blog and I appreciate a hard working lady!
Hi Nicole, I think I’ve commented once or twice but I’ve mostly been a lurker. I’ve been reading for most of the time your blog has existed, and it’s been lovely to see your life, your career, your family, and your talents expand. Thank you for sharing. Your blog and readers benefit because you share something about who you are, and don’t entirely ignore the world outside of a few select topics. You’re writing this, you’re creating it, and it makes all the sense in the world for you to authentically be who you are here. Even if you lose a few readers because of that, you can be sure that those you keep – and those you will inevitably gain – will be even more loyal. Great job, and keep it up! Best wishes to you and Brandon. xo
Haters gonna hate.
Plain and simple.
Keep kicking life’s ass.
You should be so proud of yourself! I know others have said it before, but I think it’s important to repeat: you don’t owe any of us anything. This is your space, and you do an amazing job with it. I’m so happy for you and your family. <3
I’m really glad to see that things are going well for you all. I didn’t say anything on the post with the 90 Reasons link, but I will say it here: I disagree with the link 100% (actually, probably more like 89%) but I sincerely appreciate the manner in which you presented your political opinion. A couple of weeks ago I was shocked and disturbed to visit the page of an artist I follow (or followed) and find that she had written a hateful tirade to anyone who didn’t agree with her political persuasion, even to the point of saying that we were unwelcome on her site. It was so disheartening to read. Thank you for not doing that, here.
You are an inspiration and should be proud of yourself.
Go you! You should be so proud. I’ve been an avid reader since 2007, and while I agree with your politics, I would still support you even if I didn’t. I’m so sad that you had to experience a verbal assault because of that harmless post. People need to get their heads out of their you-know-whats and take a serious chill pill.
Way to go, Nicole! You’re an inspiration.
I love your blog. The mix of home decorating, crafting, family and new sites to visit is enchanting. Your writing is charming. You don’t have to explain a thing to your readers, but I’m touched that you did. Go on and do great things. You have the creativity and imagination to go far.
Ditto! I couldnt say it better myself so I will just second Laura’s comment.
You go girl! Let the haters hate! You are an inspiration!
I just wanted to say thank you twice – first, for sharing the 90/90 link; and second – for BEING political and sharing something that makes you a more dynamic, honest person. As a queer person, I find it frustrating to not know where the bloggers I read stand on political issues. As an example, there are quite a few Christian and Mormon “mommy/lifestyle” bloggers out there with intriguing content, but I’m trepidatious about committing time to reading their content when I could, in fact, be supporting someone who doesn’t support me. When I know that ad revenue supports the blogger directly, I want to make sure I contribute my time (and clicks) to blogs written by people who are like-minded. So thank you for “outing” yourself. It makes me feel like I have more safe space on the big bad internet.
This is such an interesting comment–and it touches upon some things I think about from time to time. I felt guilty culling some blogs (that I really enjoyed) from my regular reading; but it had to be done.
I agree wholeheartedly! Nicole is daily reading for me because I enjoy her content and her writing. My husband and I are two liberal atheists living in a very politically conservative and religious area. As much as I sometimes want to share my own views online, I often remain silent for fear that there will be negative career ramifications for me. Since I cannot be open in my own life about my political leanings, I will gladly throw my support (and page clicks) behind Nicole.
Oh, I hate that you feel like you need to explain this because someone was a jerk. While I do think making political statements can be extremely divisive without any real gain on a home/design/family blog, (I’m glad I didn’t see it — I’d prefer to not know) — that’s really neither here nor there. Your personal financial matters is your business and no one else’s. That said, I’m glad you were willing to share. You work very hard and are extremely creative. It’s very encouraging to me as a wife, mom, designer and blogger that you’re doing well doing what you love. Kudos to you!
I love hearing about your real life struggles. You tell it honestly (even though you have no obligation to any readers to do it–it’s your blog). Congratulations on your accomplishment! It’s huge to be able to do that and you’ve worked hard for it.
I am so PROUD of you! What a wonderful feeling to be able to support your family and know they have a loving parent to be with them as well. You are truly a role model for others. Keep it up!
Oh Nicole, I read this through tears. Like others have said, you don’t owe us an explanation and it’s none of our business, but I applaud your openness and honesty. I admire you so much as a blogger and businesswoman, and I’ve taken some of your classes to learn more from you. You’re such an inspiration, and I would love to be able to earn money doing something I love. I wish you and your family all the best, and I’m thrilled that things are working out for you guys. :)
I loved that link! I have shared it with all of my friends and family! Good luck to you and your family. I too am the bread winner in my household while my husband concentrates on school. We have a baby on the way and he can’t wait to add stay-at-home-Daddy to his to-do list. I am a new reader, and love the blog!
I am happy for your success. It is nice to see someone do well.
~FringeGirl
thedomesticfringe.com
Thanks so much for your honesty and your willingness to share, Nicole. As a fellow full-time blogger it’s really interesting to me how much scrutiny we’re constantly under. I honestly think sometimes that because people don’t see me go in and out of an office every day, they assume I’m somehow doing nothing but just raking in the dough. Like I haven’t been working or that I don’t deserve it. The reality is, I’ve been building my blog up for nearly five years now and also do freelance writing and styling work, for Babble, of course, among others. I am at the tail end of a divorce where I went from having healthcare provided and a second (larger) income to help cover all the household expenses to, well, just me. Just me, a passion for the work I do and a dream to have that work be enough to take care of myself and Uncle Sam, too. Luckily, I can now say confidently that I am doing that, but let’s not kid ourselves into thinking I can afford to buy all the pretty things I blog about. And the day where I can take some time off here and there without freaking out hasn’t yet come, but maybe someday it will. At any rate, I am so incredibly happy for you for your success and for the life it has helped shape for your family. As a long time reader, I know how hard you work and I thank you for sharing your story with us! xoxo
be proud of what you’ve been able to accomplish!
I really enjoy your blog. Thanks for all that you do. :)
I appreciate your honesty and I, like someone else mentioned, also appreciated that little glimpse into another side of you. There are a number of design/family blogs run by people with very different political views and sometimes it makes me feel a little uncomfortable. I think the 90/90 project is well designed, well written, and well worth the shout out. I will try to follow your ad links more often to make up for any revenue you might lose for sharing that side. I thought you handled the shout out tactfully and gracefully. I am sorry it is causing you problems.
In this post and in Friday’s Honor Roll, you’ve presented yourself the way you always have: with honesty and confidence but always with a respect for other viewpoints. I come to this blog to see how YOU see the world. I may not see the world in exactly the same way, but your view is intriguing enough that I keep coming back.
You write your blog as you see fit and you live with the consequences. While I don’t visit here expecting political commentary – just as I don’t come here expecting you to disclose the details of your personal financial situation – each post is a part of “you” and I respect that. Good for you for standing up for what you believe in. Good for you for striking off a major item on your Life List!!
You are living MY dream! Congratulations on making this work for your family!
I’m so sorry that you feel the need to explain yourself. What you guys did while your husband was on UI was exactly what you are supposed to do – live your life and figure stuff out so that you can move forward.
Nicole,
You should know that for each cranky downer there are thousands of happy loyal readers who love to hear your opinions – political or otherwise! You rock!!! Keep up the good work xoxo
Can I just simply say BRAVO!!!
I am happy to support you and this blog! I love your writing and your style!
Are you likely to reopen pink loves brown? I’d love to purchase some of those stationary suitcases? Do you know where I could get them in Canada if you aren’t selling them anymore?
Thank you,
Mairi
Great for you and your family! Be proud and let the haters stew in their own muck. Glad you’ve been able to make this goal of yours happen.
You surely deserve your success and you don’t have to apologize about it to anyone! You are doing a great job and your blog is always an inspiring place to visit. :-)
You deserve absolutely every bit of the success that you’re earning, and kudos to you for making your way in an unconventional choice. Keep writing about it, we need more trailblazers like yourself!
Such an incredible achievement for you, well done! You do amazing work, and deserve the success that’s coming to you right now.
I think it’s ridiculous that you have to (or feel like you have to) explain your financial situation. Making It Lovely is a passion and a business. You post content that people are clearly interested in and follow regularly. Advertisers and sponsors recognize that or they wouldn’t pay you. This is your space. Period. I personally didn’t read the link because I don’t come to Making It Lovely for politics. But, that’s just it…I read what I want and don’t read what I don’t want to. I enjoy your blog very much. I get something out of it. How much money you make and how you provide for your family is nobody’s business.
You certainly don’t owe us anything, but I am pleased to see this update. I was so sad for you when Brandon lost his job. I’m very glad to hear that your family is making this new situation work and sorry about all the vitriol on that other post. Yikes! I saw it pop up in my feed reader last week, but didn’t really think anything of it. I’m guessing it’s probably a non-issue for most people, but there’s always that vocal minority.
Keep up the gorgeous monthly style posts and the making it yours posts. Those are my favorites!
Thank you for sharing, though you owe us no explanations. Good for you for doing what you need to for your family and shame on those who are so ignorant and so uninformed that they resort to name calling. I’m scared for our future because these are the people that go out and vote…uninformed! Stay true to you, we are still reading. I hope to get to where you are someday!
I appreciated your political link, I think it’s important to respectfully share your opinion and provide information. Congratulations on successfully supporting your family – that’s awesome :)
Thank you for the 90/90 link. I’ve been enjoying following them on Facebook.
Congratulations on this amazing accomplishment. I admire your frankness about your family’s employment situation, how you have resolved it, and especially the graciousness with which you have shared it.
So inspiring! Thanks for sharing your path to now. And keep on sharing every little thing that you like. More inspiration for us all!
Congratulations on achieving your goal of being able to make enough to support your family. I have been a reader since your Pink Loves Brown days and I’ve seen your empire as well as your family grow. Best Wishes to you and your family in the future. I cannot believe the gall of someone to attack you personally for your political views.
From one sole breadwinner mom and wife to another, I say hats off to you! I really admire your ability to go your own way and find true success. This is a DESIGN blog…I cannot believe anyone would attack your lifestyle over a political post. That is sad. Why can’t women be more supportive of each other rather than trying to tear down over the smallest of details?
Well that post made the comments flow in; ) You’re awesome! That’s quite an accomplishment to be the sole provider of the family! While I don’t agree with you politically- I don’t care for Obama and happen to think he much less than ideal for President- I don’t think it’s right for anyone to insult you personally! That hurts! We are all entitled to our own opinions and that would not stop me from reading your blog. I check it out daily and love what you do: )
You are awesome!
I did not read your political article! I really want to see your projects and that’s why I read your blog. I think all people can make that choice too. You can read what you are interested in and just cruise on to something else if you are not.
But…
(and of course I do not know you!!)
I feel your pain. I am the prime breadwinner in my family and my husband does the lion’s share of the running kids to and from activities, shopping, meals, bath time, etc. I think it works out fine for us. His schedule is more flexible as a small business owner, but it is amazing how many people are bothered by it and choose to say so.
Again, that is a choice.
I would suggest making the choice to not get into other people’s business.
I think you are doing wonderful and don’t let people tell you otherwise! How you earn your money and what you do with them are your business only.I think you are an inspiration and well done you!
Brandon also! Way to go, stay-at-home-dad!
Congratulations! I’m proud of you.
p.s. I loved the 90/90.
The end of this post gave me chills! You are such an inspiration! Thanks for posting this story, I’m feeling pumped after reading it!
I think it’s wonderful that you are able to support your family full time. And I equally think it’s awful that someone would jump on your for posting one political link and then presume to know your entire life/family/financial situation. But kudos to you for putting it out there!
Thanks for being an inspiration! Congrats!!!
There will always be people who say things that can hurt… But don’t listen to them! You should be proud of yourself for what you did for your family and for making our day more lovely ♥
Congratulations for all you do! I hope to read you for years ;)
You’re amazing and an inspiration. I don’t normally comment, but I had to on this one. What a wonderful blessing you are to your family. (And Brandon is a blessing, too! I slyly showed my husband your post about his birthday gifts for you and his sweet birthday note) It is wonderful seeing people live the American dream. It is hard work, but the American dream is still alive and well!
If the other 3 bazillion bloggers out there can punctuate every other sentence with “Praise G*d” etc., and Nicole’s lone political link (and her person) gets pilloried, then the case has been made as to why I’m a proud Freethinking Liberal.
Brandon paid his dues to society as a hard-working, gainfully employed taxpayer. He EARNED his place in this world.
In the meantime, I have next door neighbors who are supporting their never-worked-a-day-in-her-life granddaughter who is pregnant with her second child (her first is 3,can’t speak coherently, and is never read to because–and I quote directly–“reading is dumb”)–father unknown *again*. They’re on all forms of welfare (last month the taxpayers bought the grandpa his 3rd electric scooter, a new oxygen tank, and a box of Newport Menthols among other things). And they’re Republicans! In the meantime, my husband serves his country–the Liberal Trash that he is–in the Air Force.
So yeah. The people who are so eager to vilify you and your family can stow it. And then go volunteer at their kids’ school or something.
CONGRATS! Is it weird to say that I am so proud of you? Well, I am! That is an amazing accomplishment… thanks so much for sharing an update with those you inspire daily!
congrats to you!!!!! i love that you followed your dreams and it is working. you should be so proud of yourself and i am quite sure your hubby is as well! shame on people for saying mean things. unfortunately, there are people in this world who feel the need to be negative…..you just keep doing what you are doing and continue to grow personally and professionally!!!! thanks for sharing your story! so inspirational!!! xoxoxo
Love your blog and your honesty. Thanks do much for all that ou do. You should be so proud of your hard work and accomplishments.
Absolutely …. I agree.
Reader of your blog Nicole …. love it! Not sure I ever commented though.
Why do folks get so upset? Too weird.
The various advertising gigs are fantastic! Wow. To me that is a fun and creative way to make a decent living. Keep it up! More power to you Nicole.
It’s really a shame that someone used your honesty about a difficult situation as an opportunity to judge and slam you. Personally, as someone who has gone through job loss I appreciate your openness and I think your story is really inspirational. Thanks, Nicole!
Go you! To heck with the grinches. I was boggled to see that it raised such hackles. Just wanted to sign on as one more supporter. (p.s. I did graduate from Reed … looks like you’re doing just fine without it! ;)
I’m not a lover of shopping trips any more due to limited income, but that doesn’t make me not read your blog! I usually enjoy it immensly and if I don’t like the subject I can always “close” my browser and move on!
I had an unexpected hatefilled ‘conversation’ the other day on FB with someone who made a political statement, I responded, and she really flew off the handle. Because I tried to be calm, reassure her it was ok to disagree, she started REALLY name calling. I finally unfriended her and it was over. Wow. Never knew there were those out there with such a poison pen attitude.
I’ll still love your column even if I disagree with you politically. After all, my faith demands I love anyway.
Ohmygosh …. this happened to me also, a few weeks ago. The subject matter was spanking (or hitting … what is the dif???) children.
Well, I am completely and totally against any type of physical abuse toward any child. It proves nothing. Only that a bigger someone can hit a little person. Boo.
There are countless other ways to get the message across. Geez. Folks are sooo impatient, uptight and horribly cruel. I would never even hit (ever-ever) my pet. The results are always fear and loathing. Not on my time clock.
Brava, Nicole!
Congratulations lady!! Supporting your family through your creativity is a HUGE accomplishment and one I’m working on myself. More power to you sister!
Nicole- congratulations on all of the rewards that your hard works are bringing your way! Good for you for sticking it out- it takes balls. As for your political commentary- keep it up. I know that it’s not your aim because this is a blog about fashion and design, but who are we kidding, you also post aspirations, pics of the kids etc. so your politics are just another extension of you. If people disagree with your politics, then they can find plenty of blogs that nod in agreement with that aspect of their lives. Please keep on keeping on.
While I don’t think anyone deserves an explanation, I do appreciate the little peek into your life. I’m glad it’s all worked out and I love seeing your other material around the web (i.e Babble and the like). Politics and money make people crazy!
Ok, back to lurking ;)
Oh, for sure. I so agree w/your comment about the p & m! You said it Danni!
Been reading along since 2007. I think you and your work has progressed into a beautiful butterfly that hasn’t stopped gaining altitude and friends. You are writing to a mass audience – no way everyone will love your thoughts and opinions. But to the few and mostly many that do; keep at it. And by the way huge congrats on ‘Making it Work’ when times are not easy.
Congrats, Nicole!
I don’t think you needed to explain anything. BUT, I really don’t care to know any blogger’s political affiilations. Honestly, sometimes it becomes so overpowering that I permanently click the top “x” button. Unless I am reading an economist’s blog or a political blog, it really has no relevance. In the same manner, I don’t care to know the political leanings of any celebrity. I think Mir’s article on workitmom.com from a few weeks ago was particularly instructive.
Wow, sometimes people just don’t know better. Nicole, I have such respect for you — for stepping up to the plate and supporting your family, but also for your intelligence, taste, and ingenuity. You’ve created your life and all the blessings in it, and I think you should be as amazed with yourself as all of us are of you.
fabulous for you. but kind of sad that you have to divulge your personal finances because some trolls put bloggers on some creepy pedestal only to knock them down the second they can swap jealousy for self-righteousness. you’re a person, a talented one. you deserve a certain level of privacy and respect for your work. i hope the bloggosphere changes soon. =(
Dear Nicole,
Congrats on meeting up the goal this year! We are so proud of you and love your style!
Making it Lovely is THE blog I recommend to my friend now.
I’m impressed that you are willing to share such private things going on with “strangers”, but I get it that sometimes tackling with unfriendly comments is such pressure.
Don’t worry I’m sure the most of us are here for you no matter what haters say!;)
All the Best wishes!
Congrats to you on being able to support your family! I’m happy for you that you’ve found an arrangment that works best for you and your family. Isn’t that all anyone can ask for? And because I adore your blog and its stylish content, I’m happy to support it.
I cannot even begin to imagine the scrutiny that lifestyle bloggers are under – my cooking blog never rec’d enough traffic to warrant much interest – but from what I’ve read, it seems seriously intense. It’s a strange ‘relationship’ that develops, understandably as more and more personal content is shared.
But it saddens me to think that readers can’t simply choose to stop reading if they’re not happy with the content. It’s not as if we went to the mall and bought a t-shirt – only to realize when we got home that it said VOTE FOR PEDRO, or some other candidate that we don’t support. Guess what? Since you paid for it, you can go back and get a refund. It’s even easier with a blog – just don’t go back.
Eh, haters gotta hate! That being said, I loved the 90/90 link!
Keep up the great work!!
Danielle, great analogy, I hope you don’t mind if I steal the idea about Vote for Pedro. Ann
Thank you for taking the time to share this part of your story. Of course, you in no way owe your readers a explanation or justification for how you are living, but it is always nice to learn about the creative ways people are managing their work and children and finances. These kinds of posts help a lot of us, I think, to make the best choices in our own situations.
That’s such a huge accomplishment! Congratulations!
THANK YOU for posting the 90 Days article. Big idea; if you don’t want to read about politics, don’t click on it. If you don’t like this blog, don’t read it. Easy as that! *I* for one shall continue to enjoy it and extend my congratulations and admiration to you!
It is a sad day when people come into your home (blog) and feel that they can attack, slam, and criticize you based on what you believe and support. I hate that you felt compelled to explain your political decision or your financial situation or your familial arrangements because some disagreed with your politics. Whatever happened to civility? respect for a two-party system? respect for one’s fellow citizenship? You have a right to support whichever candidate you wish, a right to express that support in the forum that you built, and the right to not have to explain yourself to those coming for a visit. It would also be nice if we could see ourselves as citizens, contributing and benefiting collectively–which of course we actually are. Whether food stamps, unemployment benefits, public education from pre-k through graduate school, and use of publically developed, subsidized, and/or maintained roads, air travel, and broadcast tv, we all are recipients of aid from the government and what we do with our income and what our income sources are really is no one else’s business.
My husband was laid off 2 years ago and it was not a topic I cared to discuss. We are lucky he was able to find another job quickly, but I can certainly relate to the fear and uncertainty. I think you are amazing! You are supporting your family by doing something you love. That is the dream for so many. That person who decided she/he knows your life story and is delusional enough to try and attack you for your right to post what ever you want can suck it.
Love your blog!
I do hope you also received many comments thanking you for honestly stating your political preference!! If not, consider yourself thanked by a fellow Obama fan! I’ve enjoyed every bit of your blog and am happy for your success! p.s. someone who negatively judges you isn’t worth your energy!
Go Nicole! Haters gonna hate. I always find it so strange when people feel it is okay to rip someone apart when they are reading their blog. You can write about whatever you like. ITS YOUR BLOG. People forget that sometimes. I rarely comment but read your blog daily. Just know that soooo many people read and appreciate your blog and support you.
Good for you! We all have to figure it out. Ugh, I hate the haters! I’m so so happy for you!
I love that you were able to cleanly, honestly, respectfully, clearly refute the haters. Your blog has *almost* gotten the ax from my feed reader the past three purges, because our tastes don’t overlap much, but it’s the occasional big WOWs I feel when you suddenly make me fall in love with something outside my comfort zone, and posts like this one, that t keep me coming back. You are totally girly & fashion-focused, but AT THE SAME TIME a totally amazing mom, savvy businesswoman & entrepreneur, and an extremely hard worker. I truly admire you! Keep doing your thing. You have found your niche, and I am positive it will keep working for you for as long as you keep loving it.
I’m saddened, but not shocked, that people attack you personally. For years my husband and myself had to work at jobs we loathed to support our family. And by support, I mean barely scrape by. I Lost my job unexpectedly in October of last year and collected unemployment. It was hard, and with an autistic child that I home schooled and was allowed to have have with me at my last job…finding another one was impossible. My husband was offered a job that was more money, meaning I didn’t have to work and that we would relocate three hours away from home…was a welcomed thing! I have a blog that I don’t make money from…haven’t figured that out..it’s mostly rambling and recipes etc….but I enjoy it.
Puerile are cruel, and it’s sad you had to explain you’re personal life for everyone but you are doing great. In the end it’s your babies and family that matter! Xoxo
I don’t comment often, but I had to tell you how impressed I am by your drive and work ethic. Good for you, Nicole, and good for you for posting this very rational response to some ding dong offended by one political link (not even a post). It sounds as if you can lean liberal AND be a hard worker? Who knew!
How terrible that someone would judge you and your family without knowing the facts. Life is what it is, and that person is obviously a bitter, closed minded soul, who clearly has no compassion and is incredibly judgmental. What you do is inspiring, and brings great joy to a lot of people. Don’t ever doubt for even a moment the impact you have on your readers. Even those of us who have never commented before, we find great comfort in much of the information you provide. Keep up the amazing work, and know that some of us are cheering you on no matter what your family situation is!
When you do amazing things and excel at them, you are the recipient of both negative and positive judgement. I find that focusing your energy on the positive will lead you further ahead than responding or reacting to the negative. Imagine President Obama getting on TV and responding to the insults, wrongful accusations and just plain ignorant comments that are made about him as a person and as a president. There’s no need to acknowledge or react. I say “go on, girl!”. Let haters hate and keep up the awesomeness that you do every day :)
I know it must be difficult for you to share certain personal situations here. I very much appreciate you sharing with us and also understand that it’s not mandatory that you do so.
Oh good grief. Why should people get so offended that you have an opinion on politics that you shared (once!) on your own blog? I’m sorry you also feel compelled to have to explain your home life situation to people who make poor assumptions based on what they see (or don’t see) on your blog. Anyway, good for you for making this blog work for your family.
So sorry you felt the need to have to defend yourself on your blog. This is your blog. Your place to talk about and promote whatever you dang well please. We, as readers, are just along for the ride. If we don’t like it, then we don’t have to read it.
I have to say though, I am so proud of you for making it work. I’ve been reading you from the beginning and live nearby, and have always had a secret dream in my heart to quit the day job and do exactly what you’re doing. So amazing to see what success you have had. You’re really doing a great job at keeping the blog interesting after all these years.
Much love and gratitude for you sharing your life with the internet.
You can do whatever you set you mind to and I know this year will be even more fruitful than ever, you are such an inspiration, go-getter and totally original:)
GO YOU!!!!!
Holy cow! Go YOU! And I think it’s wonderful that you’re able to support your family with a job you created yourself. That’s the only truly stable way to go. You’re in charge, so if things go well, it’s due to your own hard work and you’re not a slave to the whims of corporate management. I think it’s awesome.
But— what gives with miserable people tearing down women who are working their butts off to build a business? Aren’t we supposed to be cheering each other on? Shame on them. Truly.
Nicole, I think you’re great. It’s wonderful that your family worked through a difficult situation and is thriving. These are strange days, and I admire your courage in sharing your lives with us (and those that judge should be ashamed of themselves). I also appreciate that your posts are well-rounded and inclusive. I’m not a mother, for example, but I peek at your Babble contributions occasionally. It’s what makes you, and your blog, unique. I wish much more success and happiness.
Wow. Just wanted to say that it’s ridiculous you felt the need to defend yourself, but your post was great. I can’t stand the judging. The interwebs should be a happy pretty place.
Congrats on reaching a goal! Very inspirational.
YOU GO GIRL. I’m currently making more than my boyfriend (and probably will for the next few years), and it scares me a bit when I think about starting to raise a family – how to balance things if I end up being the primary breadwinner, and even a supporter of a SAHD. Your willingness to share how you manage and THRIVE is even more inspirational to me than all your lovely design work. Thanks :-D
I felt the need to comment, since I am one of your silent readers. It is very easy for someone to be judgmental of you when they are hiding behind a computer screen. You have shared your life, your home, your children, openly with us. Freely. Not all of us are that brave. I personally love your posts, have purchased from your stationary store, and have been following you for quite a while. Congratulations on reaching your goal. Please know that while some of us do not post often, there are a TON of us who appreciate the work you do and the inspiration you provide to us.
been reading your blog for over 2 years now and have to say that i relate to you more now than in months past. i have always liked your style and decorating tips, but i find myself enjoying your lifestyle posts more now. you are so down to earth and that is what keeps me reading.
Nicole, I’m just extremely proud of both of you. I love your blog and have read for years. I think it’s wonderful that you and Brandon are able to do what is BEST for your family no matter what anyone else says. What works for you, might not work for someone else. Only you two know what is best for your family. I hope {and know} that you will continue pursuing that. Looking forward to more wonderfulness fro Making it Lovely!
Congrats!
Nicole, you are an inspiration, and so is Brandon! Three cheers for you and your family taking the non-conventional route and also for standing up to the haters. You have so much of which to be proud.
It is crazy that you have to defend yourself. As a blogger I am sure you know people are crazy but PEOPLE ARE CRAZY. Good for you for doing well – good for you for carving out a place where you can be re-nummerated for your passion – good for you for closing the pay gap! You are entitled to your opinions – political or otherwise – and I am happy every time there is a new post for me to enjoy.
GO YOU!!! I think what you’re doing is amazing and think you should feel so proud of yourself.
Pay no attention to the haters, especially the ones who get their feathers ruffled because they realized that their political beliefs differ from yours. We live in a democracy, people.. get over it.
Wow as somebody from outside the US I find the reaction to you’re previous post amazing. To be honest I like looking at the eye candy in blog posts but I can’t believe how rarely a reference is made to politics or economics or any of the big issues effecting us all. Why shouldn’t someone write about their political leanings? Is a woman’s place only to discuss the lighter fluffier things in life? Can’t we like those things and also have intelligent political debate? There seems to be no restraint on many blogs (not yours Nicole) for people to promote their religious leanings and nobody ever comments with an opposing view. Just very very strange from a european perspective where people generally keep their religious views private and politics can be discussed openly without expecting a reprise (generally speaking that is).
Anyway good on you, I respect you intelligence and integrity!
good for you nicole. i have read your blog for years and i think you are hardworking and amazing at what you do. harsh comments do provide opportunities for reflection but there are so many, many people out there that have been inspired by what you do and how you write and the tone that you present.
I really think that people who are conservative think that all persons who hold different opinions are all on some kind of Government handout. Just a tiny bit of investigation might disabuse them of this perception but they never seem willing to admit any validity to any other opinion but their own. Puzzles me completely. I rejoice in your success and enjoy your blog enormously. Thanks for your contribution of creativity.
You’ve handled this with such grace. It is a privilege to be let into your life on such a personal level and it’s unfortunate that some people (agreeing or disagreeing with your values and views) take advantage of and abuse that privilege. I enjoy your blog immensely, I am inspired by your posts, and I wish you the best.
As the breadwinner in our family — after my husband lost his job over a year ago — it takes a set of cajones to do what you and I are doing. Hang in there. Being brave and strong and a woman is tougher than it looks. BRAVO!
I’m a teen, and I follow plenty lifestyle blogs. None of my friends do, but I like them because they make me smile and/or happy :) Anyhoo, I look forward to your Honor Roll posts each week, and when I read the last one, I thought nothing about the political link. Maybe its because I can’t vote, but I was a disgusted at the comments I read. I was honestly surprised at the way adults were acting. Please know that I will always follow your blog, and I wish you and your family the best of luck.
You rock. Love your blog! Keep working hard and hang in there!!!!
Good for you. You should be nothing but proud of all you’ve accomplished, both on your own and as a couple/family. Keep up the fantastic work.
Nicole….May I just say ‘You are all kinds of AWESOME’!
Best,
Jennifer
i am and will continue to be loyal reader and avid supporter. you do what you have to and shouldn’t have to explain it or apologize for it.
thank you!
Proudly a long time reader, wish I had commented before. The grace you display when attacked by people who know nothing of your life outside this blog is inspiring and empowering! Looking forward to reading about your next endeavor and how it helps you and your family grow. Best of luck!
Holy Moly. I can’t believe how graciously you wrote that post. I find it quite appalling that anyone would ever right a negative comment about one of your posts. Move on to the next blog dear negative people! Don’t let them dim your light Nicole.
You go girl. I’ve been the breadwinner for a few months now, and it’s tough to balance everything. You’re doing what matters most, which is doing what’s right for your family. Ignore the haters.
xo
C
How fantastic – ignore all the haters – they’re just jealous!! Lisa, Australia
Good on you! I’m really super delighted to know that you are secretly this great role model (being the bread winner, and doing it while doing work you love!) but rather annoyed on your behalf that someone felt it was ok to attack you.
You know what, good for you guys! Thanks for sharing something so personal so graciously. That’s why I look forward to your posts so much. The tone is always gracious and warm. You DO rock.
You shouldn’t have to make apologies for trolls who know nothing about you. You do what you have to do to support your family and it works! People just don’t know when to shut up. Like Lisa from Australia said, they’re just jealous.
Yo go girl! I love your content, I love your style and I love your can-do attitude!
I am very proud of all your success, it is so hard for many of us (especially woman to woman) to celebrate each other, but I think we are getting better. Well spoken and clear, your family like much of the US are finding “no traditional” ways to thrive, great work!
Wow, it never ceases to amaze me what people with too much time on their hands will do. Nicole–you’re doing great! I’ve been reading since before you were pregnant with Eleanor. The first thing I thought when I moved from MN to MI was….I’ll be closer to Making it Lovely! LOL. Seriously, you are a wonder and inspiration to many. Please don’t be dragged down by the jealous and petty, even if they sometimes are the loudest and most zealous in commenting.
People who start their argument with personal insults do not add anything to the discussion. I’ve seen more contentious links on Facebook. My husband is liberal and has many friends who fall in both the conservative and liberal spectrum. What’s great about the discussions on his Wall and in person are that both sides can back up their arguments with facts. I believe there should be more interest instead of apathy in politics.
As for “fancy shopping trips” that’s plain jealousy and that person does not know anything about the hustle you have to do as a freelancer and work is still work (no matter how much you love your job).
Nicole, congratulations for this. You are a true inspiration and so graceful. I love reading your blog since before the babies! and I understand… I am single mom and have NO choice but support my family. I am a proud follower ;) Hugs from Mexico! xo
Can’t believe the comments to the previous post. I have always liked your blog because you are professional, you write with correct grammar, your content is interesting and creative and you have showed a get up and go non- whining American spirit that I Love! You don’t talk about Gods plan like many bloggers do, you make your own plan. Your design and ideas are as good as any out there. We all know that many of the houses in Architectural Digest are derivative at best. You have never written anything off color, mean, or snarky. In sum, you are one of the few adults in Blogland. Even if you linked to Ron Paul, or Rick Perry, I would follow you. I’m proud to be a reader of such an intelligent blog. Don’t let the **********s, fill in your own words, get you down. Ann Wilson
Thank you for sharing your light and magic through the years. Your blog has inspired me and cheered me up on many a day. You have shared your family life, your craft and mostly yourself on this blog and you own not one person an explanation on what you do with your time, money, or life. I wish I could say that I was appalled by the comment that sparked this post, but there are a lot of insecure and unhappy people in the world that have no idea how get to a happier place, so insulting you is just another way for them to act out their displeasure. May blessings continue to find you and your lovely family. Shine on!!!
Nicole, if you lose readership, I would be most happy to pay an annual subscription to your blog. It would be worth far more than the $30 plus I spent on a year’s worth of Folk magazine. Ann
Congratulations! You bust your butt to make it work and you deserve to be successful. I hope every year is better than the next for you and your family.
Happy that you’re happy!
Nicole, I just wanted to tell you how much I enjoy your blog! You are definitely among my favorites and I’ve passed on and will continue to pass on your posts to friends and family. Cheers to you and your blog!!
You are amazing, and your hubby, too. You both work hard. Things may look different now than when you started out, but you’re both working hard to provide. Please keep in mind that there are always going to be people who want to say nasty things behind the cover of anonymity that the internet provides. It is not how everyone who reads your blog sees things, though. You have to buy clothes, you have to eat, you even need to relax and get away once in awhile. I think you’ve always been up front and honest with your readers. Your choices have not seemed extravagant or dishonest to me. I admire how, even when life threw you some major curve balls, you kept at it. I don’t know that I could do the same, but you give me hope that if bad things happen, I can keep at it, too! Thank you!
Congratulations on achieving this life list goal. It was your list that inspired me to get my Life List and blog off the ground – so thank you.
I remember reading your post back in January about your husband losing his job and thinking how hard that must be. Fast forward a few months and I too find myself in that same situation, with my husband’s company going bust a few weeks back. He is currently working overseas, but once that project finishes, I am the sole bread winner. It will be hard, but your story is my inspiration that things will work out, somehow…eventually.
As for the backlash you received after your Honor Roll post. I just don’t understand why people take offence to differences in opinions. Your blog is not about politics, so why should your beliefs impact on how I view your blog? Maybe I am naive? Maybe it is because I am Australian and we don’t take politics as seriously?
Best of luck on achieving more of your goals.
In light of such a nasty comment, I just want to voice my love for you/this blog. It’s one of the few that captures what I love about life (design/kids/awesomeness) without being cutesy or forced. You seem so genuine (and very lovely), and I just plain love this place.
Plus I live in Downers Grove, so someday I hope to bump into you. And although I would bumble and blush, and you would be totally chill, and Eleanor and August would be looking so stylish, and I would certainly embarrass myself, I would love it.
We live in Woodridge. I keep thinking we’ll see Nicole at Ikea!
Way to go Nicole! You are an inspiration to moms and blogging moms alike.
Truly, the only thing that bums me out about this post is that you felt a need to justify your life. It is NOBODY’s business what you and/or your husband do for a living, and I am just galled that someone has the time to make comments like that. You keep up the good work!
just wanna holla at you… so hoooolllaaaa! lol
been reading your blog for several months now. thought it best to contribute to the waves of positive commenta coming your way after this post.
please keep the awesome posts coming! :)
You have a voice, and i you want to use it to promote someone or something you believe in, guess what…there is freedom of speech in this country and I know it is hard to hear negativity coming back about it, please continue if you want to. I happen to share your political views but even if I didn’t I would say speak your mind, USE your voice.
Kudos to you and Brandon! You’re obviously a great team.
I admire that you are finding success with your blog. You provide endless inspiration.
Love to you and yours, Nicole. :)
Nicole — i love your blog! thank you for sharing so much of you and your adorable families’ lives with us. Keep your chin up you’ve got al lot of love out here!
Good for you! I have to say that I used be ambivalent about sponsored blog posts. But now I am good with it as long as the products are in line with the blogger’s viewpoint and don’t seem inconsistent with the blog. I am always happy support blogs that I love and read often. It’s so great that you do it so well that you can make a living out of it.
Nicole – how you make your money and support your family is nobody’s business but yours. Unfortunately some blog readers think because they read your blog every day, they have the right to comment on your personal life, which is a little weird to me.
Like you, my aim is to be in a position to earn more than my husband so that he can stay home when we start a family. I love my job as a teacher and can’t imagine taking years off work, whereas he doesn’t have the same passion for his job, so it only makes sense that he stay home, rather than me. I admire that you’ve been able to do that! I can only imagine all the hard work you’ve put in! Congratulations for reaching your goal!
– Sarah.
Your such an inspiration to all woman! You define success as the new “traditional” mom. I love it and more power to you. Keep rocking on…!
Hi! I recently found your blog and I’m enjoying it thoroughly. I wanted to congratulate you this news! It must be so amazing to be able to provide for your family and enough so your husband can be a stay at home dad. That’s pretty amazing. Well, I just wanted to say congrats and thanks for re-linking to your Obama post. OBAMA 2012!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :)
Keep your head up! I hope you are not letting one weirdo comment get to you. You don’t need to explain or justify ANYTHING to ANYBODY. I am super inspired by you.
This post was so eloquently written…it just goes to show that if anyone can make a living from writing, it’s you!
Im a big fan. Keep up the good work. Leave the haters in the dust.
It’s been said, but you rock. :)
Nicole, I have been a long-time reader and never left a comment (bad blogger) but absolutely had to chime in with my vote of support and commendation. I was so impressed by your keynote in Toronto, you were amazingly honest, straight-forward, and professional. This just cements my opinion and provides me with even more inspiration. You are at the forefront of a whole new profession and a whole new industry, and in a very public way! You are bound to mis-step and anger people on an un-trodden road. I just wanted to remind you that there are those of us coming up behind you who are aware of how much smoother you have made that road for us and appreciate all the sign posts you have planted along the way. Bravo for this accomplishment – and thank you!
While I appreciate reading a little insight into your life, you don’t owe anyone who reads/comments on your blog an explanation WHATSOEVER! I read the blog for the content. I enjoy it. The personal and financial decisions you and your husband make have no relation to the content or my enjoyment of your blog. I do, however, applaud you for turning this blog into a successful business, and for being in the position where you had the choice for your husband to be a SAHD. Congratulations! You go girl!
i’m sorry that others make such sour assumptions that you feel compelled to explain yourself. losing our jobs or having a partner get laid off can happen to anyone in this economy; you are such an inspiration to all of us out there trying to make ends meet and do what you love. straight up kudos for your honesty and humbleness.
I think it’s fantastic that you were able to find a way to do what you love and be able to take care of yourself and your family at the same time. It’s very inspiring! Unfortunately, there’s always going to be a certain amount of people that have something negative to say, perhaps because they can’t think outside the box (sad). I don’t think you need to waste time and energy on them. Just know that your hard and unique work is very much appreciated and you should be proud of your accomplishments. As long as you are all happy and well, keep doing what you do and thanks for sharing all your ideas with us,
De-lurking to tell you how awesome and inspiring you are. I love your blog and it’s amazing that you can support your family by doing what you love. Haters gonna hate.
I have always been inspired by your posts and wish you all the best! You rock.
Good for you and congratulations! Hope for the best always and you shall get it! :)
You rock lady! I’ve read your blog for years and never felt compelled to comment until now. I was just so horrified that you felt you had to defend your decisions/lifestyle because of one cranky reader. I love your content and all of your hard work that you do- thank you for all of it!
I’m super excited for you! Way to bring home that bacon!
And I’m sorry your round-up of interesting things had to become so intense. If people care enough to get that upset, they should probably switch to satellite radio.
Congratulations Nicole. I love your blog. I hope things continue to go well for you and your family. Thank you for the work you do, you inspire me!
Please ignore the haters! Love that your family is making it work.
You go girl, these are difficult times and you are an inspiration!! Don’t take to heart comments from people that do nothing but assume that they know.
You rock,lady. It’s not easy to be freelance. My husband was laid off a few years ago and started his own business. I was working full time, and we were able to tighten our belts and make it work. Then I got pregnant as his business started making a little money, but the income was still very uncertain. I decided to leave my job rather than spend most of my money paying for daycare (we live in an expensive city), and the last 2.5 years have been very, very stressful at times. We pay so much for terrible health insurance, and a lot of my husband’s income goes to taxes (I’m sure you are in a similar situation). Still, I feel so lucky compared to many, and I think you and I are on the same page politically; I just believe that the current administration is so much more mindful of the welfare of the majority of the people in our country. Anyway, a long winded comment to say you rock. Thanks for sharing this.
Aw Nicole, this is AWESOME. I’m sorry Brandon’s had the struggles with work that he has, but the fact that you’ve been able to build your blog up to make a real living from it is a total inspiration!!! You deserve it all!
Congratulations on the success of the blog! As a devoted reader, of course I feel that your success is well-deserved.
In regards to the heated comments on Friday, I want to note that I am always interested to see another facet of the bloggers whose homes I follow with such interest. Ultimately, it’s not the pretty pictures but the personality that keeps me reading this or any blog. Whether I differ on a chair selection that looks uncomfortable, or a party theme I wouldn’t go for, or a DIY method or even a political affiliation — I don’t have to agree with everything to be able to respect and appreciate someone.
Thank you for being willing to share yourself with us.
Oh Nicole, how lovely this all is… truly. Talk about taking un-ideal circumstances and making family goals a reality! Congratulations!
You effing rule! Congrats and rock on! It is so well deserved and no doubt hard earned, you are an inspiration!
Congratulations! I am sure you are working BEYOND hard, all hours, lots of stress. Don’t let anyone writing to you from the anonymity of their computer screen make you feel like less of a success than you are. I can empathize with your struggle, with a 10mo old, my husband lost his job, I am the sole provider for our family. It is hard. I work stupid hours all night to be available for my son all day, and to let my husband continue his job search full-time. It is not easy, but SO worth it! You’re doing great, Nicole. Keep blazing the path.
Happy modern family ! Mamma blogger/daddy at home … what else ? You more than deserve all you work hard for … keep the good spirit !
You owe know one an explanation about how you and your family spends your money. Enjoy your life employed unemployed etc. Unless someone is supporting you they haven’t one reason to even inquire. Be blessed.
Thanks for sharing your story. I’m happy for you and I respect the way you approach things. Plus you have style! Wishing you and your family health and happiness. :-)
Go you!! Congratulations! I have been the primary bread winner for many years in our house but it has evened out over the last few as my husband has made more and I have taken cuts to spend more time with my kids. I feel relieved! Even though your work is nontraditional, it is diversified so you shouldn’t be too worried. And I loved the Obama piece you put up. It was great and I forwarded it to several friends.
Congrats on the results of your hard work! Well deserved.
You are doing a great job! Congratulations on making the big step. Most people only dream of making it on thier own. Obviously, these were not ideal circumstances but sometimes a push is what one needs to make a leap. All the best!
-Jeanne, Domesticspace.com
I’m always surprised by people who take the time to be so snarky. What are they thinking when they are typing? Are they like this in real life? How are they with their own friends and family? How do they teach their daughters to behave? You put nothing but goodness out into this blog. So glad some of it is coming back your wayxxx
Spark, you stated exactly what I couldn’t find words to express. I so agree.
Aww, thanks Laura!
Congrats on your success!
Any tips on finding / buying your own health insurance? I would love to freelance full time, but I have no idea where to start!
Lydia, one of the great things about the Accountable Care Act (aka health reform/Obamacare) is that it will make this process so much easier. Each state will have a health exchange that is like an online marketplace for health insurance. (Or to put it in crafty terms, consider it an Etsy for health insurance!)
People say health reform is a job killer, but it isn’t. By making it easier to purchase insurance individually, it is freeing up people like you and Nicole to leave the corporate world and start your own small business.
Hi Holly,
Thanks for your response! Health care shouldn’t be this difficult! Isn’t the “american dream” owning a business and being an entrepreneur? It’s pretty impossible if paying for insurance is more than my monthly mortgage payment. I’ve seen a lot of “on site freelance” opportunities pass me by, because my husband does contract illustration work and is on my (corporate) insurance. It’s so frustrating! Yes, it’s incentive to stay with my employer (or any employer with decent insurance), but it really limits my personal career choices.
Insurance is still difficult to navigate right now. The Affordable Care Act made it possible for my family to be covered (one of us has a pre-existing condition), but it’s still very expensive. We had to opt for 80% coverage with a $5000 deductible per person, and our monthly insurance still costs as much as our mortgage. It’s sad.
It’s sad and it’s wrong. My daughter, a newly minted 8th grade teacher, is saving $17,000/year in medical costs by having employer-paid insurance. Her husband is self-employed and in the same boat as you. This is driving two-income families.
Your personal business is your personal business…back to shopping!
Good for you, Nicole! The haters are just afraid – they don’t understand that women can be breadwinners and that success and progressive politics are NOT mutually exclusive. XOXO
Congratulations!
From late childhood one of my goals has always been to earn enough to support my family because I always wondered how my mom would’ve made ends meet if somethign happenned to my dad or to their marriage. As a resutl I’ve always been able to support my family without a second income. It’s empowering, isn’t it?!
I am sorry you were made to feel that way. I echo a previous commenter who said you owe no one an explanation.
I hope your husband and kids enjoy their time together. My husband stayed home with our kids for a year and it really strengthened their relationship.
Thanks for sharing this. May your business continue to soar!
I rarely comment but I just had to say that you don’t need to justify your existence and personal circumstances to anyone. You’re an inspiration to anyone whose significant other has lost their job and they’ve had to work out a way of making the ends meet again.
I’m Australian so I don’t get the American health care system at all. As an Australia, if you’re unemployed, self employed or employed, you are able to access the free public health care system. If you want to purchase private health insurance (which the government encourages by paying a rebate), it’s available to all and relatively affordable, depending on the coverage you select. It puzzles me why there isn’t a similar situation in America.
she doesnt HAVE to justify it, you are right. but for those of us rooting for her, it is great to see things working out for her & the family, and to know that it is still possible for someone to support their own family without punching a corporate time clock.
I’m so sorry you had to write this post, yet glad you were able to do it in a positive, respectful light. Congrats on the breadwinning and way to go stay-at-home dad!
I love it that you’ve found something that makes you happy and makes you money! Things happen for a reason, and you’ve found your calling in life. I’m confident that Brandon will find his path, too, wherever it leads the two of you and your children! Good luck!
wow, people are nuts. i can’t believe you got flack for the 90 reasons link. everyone knows republicans have bad taste so i can’t imagine why they would be surprised.
Ha!
Congratulations on your continued success! While it’s disappointing that negative comments prompted the post, your readers are THRILLED for you, Brandon and family. I bet you will look back on this year as a defining moment for your family.
Man, I can’t believe the ugly comments over a benign link. “If you like XYZ (different from me)… THEN I HAVE TO HATE YOU!!!” Keep up the good work! I look forward to seeing more from you (it doesn’t have to be your personal financial situation :-)
That is awesome and you should be so proud!!
I agree with other readers. This is your blog and you should choose to share what is important to you. Keep up the great posts!
wow. how unfortunate that you’ve been insulted about the decisions you’ve made as a family. good for you to pursue this blog. you have fantastic taste and you have it together! way to go, and keep this going!!
Nicole, YOU. ARE. AMAZING!!!! How you handle your blog, family and all of your other resposibilities is beyond me, yet you manage to do it all. For your family. There will always be those with negative attitudes, who are filled with self-loathing, and want to attack you. You and I are on opposite sides as far as political agendas are concerned, but there was nothing wrong with you posting that Obama article. This is your blog and last I checked we were living in America. Keep doing what you’re doing and those of us with class will keep reading and loving your style!
Nicole, I’m a long-time lurker but this post made me feel like I had to comment. First, congratulations on turning your Blog into something that supports your family. I’m so proud of women who stand up and do what needs to be done for themselves and especially for their families. You are an inspiration to your readers and I’m sure to your family. Second, it is sad that people feel the need to attack you. You started this Blog, you write for it and so you choose what content it will have. People have a choice to either continue to subscribe or to go elsewhere for their narrow-minded interests. No person is one-sided and to expect someone’s Blog to be is unfair. You are doing a fabulous job, please don’t let the haters get you down.
You deserve everything that you have worked hard for! You and your family have come through a tunnel and now it is time for the sun to shine on you.
Hey! You are doing great! I have been reading your blog for quite sometime now (a lurker have I been) and quite admire your spirit. Just keep up the good work and IGNORE the haters!! And I am sure your husband will soon find his groove and then you will look back at this time as a great formative period!!!
All the best!
Sona
(All the way from India)
You are a lovely and talented woman w/ an equally lovely family (and blog!). I am sad that you’d have to defend yourself to those who obviously suffer some sort of psychopathology and use online forums to air their illness. I frankly do not know how you manage to do it all, but you do. And with such grace. You’re a real role model. I hope things just keep getting better and better for you. You’ve earned it.
Amazing! You’re an inspiration :)
Nicole, this brings me back to one of my issues in life. Why can’t mothers/women support one another and assume that we are all doing our best, and that we know what is working for our families? Good luck to you and much support from me!!
Sarah in NYC (:
Good for you. It’s a shame you have to take the time to clarify these sorts of things just so some asshat understands your personal business. Just the same, I appreciate the honesty. So many of us are struggling to navigate the waters. Money. Insurance. Stability. Savings. I don’t know how people do it, but I do know that one day, your kids will look back at this post and recognize that their mom had balls. Good for you guys. Good for you!
I’m not an Obama fan, but I’m a huge fan of you! I’m sorry that some people aren’t open to polite political discussion–it is one of the worst things about our country right now. You have the right to post your opinions and vote however you like, as does everyone else.
You didn’t have to share about your personal life here either, though I agree with the many comments–it is an inspiration. I wish you continued success!
I love your blog. I am so surprised that people could get all up in arms about a link posted on your personal blog. If I disagree with something written somewhere, I go elsewhere. Why do people find that so hard?
Good for you, supporting your family all on your own!
There are plenty of friends I have that don’t see eye to eye with politically. You know what? It doesn’t matter. Life is too short! Its your blog, you post what you want and keep kicking ass, girlfriend! Stand tall & be proud – you earned it!
Nicole, cheers to you!
Nicole the things you share on your blog are a constant inspiration to me. Keep on doing what you’re doing and bringing home that bacon!
Love your blog, but I don’t typically comment. But I have to say shame on whomever thought it was any of their business how you and your husband decide to support your family. You don’t owe any explanations for the choices you make in your life, especially when it comes to doing what’s best for your family. Bravo to you for having the smarts–and courage–to be able to step out on faith at each step along the way, and for the successes it has brought you. Best of luck to you all.
This is an amazing thing to accomplish.
As for the fancy shopping trips, I love ’em. I think it makes more money sense to buy less but buy quality and honestly, when I look at your extremely edited lifestyle via the blog, I can tell the finances are in order.
Again, congratulations on the huge achievement!
Much continued success (from very hard work and a great internal support system). You guys deserve it!
wow. i feel like i want to hit the person who slammed you. you are so awesome, and i give you many props for supporting your family! i’ve been reading your blog for 5 years, and never felt like you owed me an explanation for how you spend your money. in fact, i think you’ve been more than forthcoming about your situation, your sponsors. in addition, nothing has ever given me the impression that you spend extravagently! hope all the support you see here far outweighs the CRAZY.
You don’t have to explain yourself or justify your life to anyone. The people who left nasty comments were clearly people who followed this blog and had no problem with it until they got a whif that you might vote differently than they will in November. To criticize you now is hypocritical, and nothing that you say about your life circumstance will change the mind of a biased and/or non-thinking person. You do you, girl. It’s why people tune in here.
I am following you from Spain, for 3 years, go ahead!!, you are doing it very well!!Mucha suerte!!
Ugh, people can be so jerk-y! Since when did it become ok to kick people when they are down, or perceived to be?
This is a success story! You get to do something you love and support your family. Your children get to have a stay at home dad. That is AMAZING, not something you need to justify. Congratulations.
Thank you for sharing your story. I am a sole provider for my family as well and I find it very inspiring to hear the stories of other women in the same position. You are awesome and amazing. Keep rocking out.
You go girl – as someone now trying her hand at living on her website I respect all that you put into it and empathize with the fear and stress of it all! I may have to pick your brain for tips one of these days. Cheers to you and your lovely family!
I just want to say that went I read that someone wrote that comment I said out loud, “What a bitch.” I’m sorry you have to deal with that kind of stuff. Keep being awesome.
GO you! You deserve it, this is a lovely blog and I’m glad you are making a living doing something you love!
I think it’s really admiral that he voluntarily quit un-employment. Many people would milk the system as long as they could.
I think that people who judge are generally jealous because they are not happy. At least that is how I used to be. Now I’m very happy, much nicer and way more easygoing.
You do you, and don’t worry about the rest.
Thank you for your courage and vulnerability in posting this. I love the blog and am so happy that you have found what works for your family. It saddens me that people can make such cruel and insensitive comments simply because they disagree with you politically. But I am also proud that our president is taking an active stance in the preservation of free speech. Keep posting about topics that are important to you.
(http://www.politico.com/politico44/2012/09/obama-addresses-the-united-nations-136598.html
Thank you for sharing such an honest and transparent post. When you write things like this, it reminds the reader that on top of being a great creative mind, you are also a real family who deal with some of the same real and difficult issues that many of us deal with. Just like me. Except that your house will always be much much more well decorated than mine. ;)
RIGHT ON, GIRL!!!
I’ve been doing this for awhile too and it is great and really empowering, but very stressful at times (hello health insurance). I give you a lot of credit for doing it as graciously as you have.
Sorry some haters have to hate on all the hard work you put into this blog and doing a lot of other work to make this lifestyle work.
xo!
– Dottie
Yay you! All of you, in fact. And I’m sorry you feel you have to justfy yourself.
I’m glad this post was more framed around gratitude and less around justification.
It’s great you want to share about how your family is making their way through the world. Particularly as a woman running her own business. I mean I appreciate the transparency, but there is no shame in unemployment while looking for work.
And to folks wanting to shame you for your posts, your sponsors or an unemployment check, well… shame on them.
You. Are. Awesome! Ignore those mean comments, you’ll always get some. But keep your head high and keep right on going. Love your blog.
I have more respect for you than ever! Isn’t it great making a living at doing what you enjoy?
I’ve been visiting your blog for years and it’s my all time favorite, just beautifully done in every way. Your success is so deserved!
Thanks for sharing! I’m SO glad that things are going well with all of your “Lovely” pursuits and you are providing for your family! My husband and I have a very non-traditional schedule, and although he works, he is able to spend tons of time with our kiddos, and I think it’s so awesome. The kids are really going to benefit by having a stay-at-home dad and such a wonderful mom, too! And, for what it’s worth, I found your “offensive” link absolutely inspiring and shared it on Facebook and e-mail. Way to root for your hometown guy! I always look forward to checking in with your blog. Thanks!
I was saddened to hear that someone would make such personal comments. Try not to take it to heart and don’t let it change how you blog. Keep being yourself (including putting in the occasional political comment). It’s what makes your blog so wonderful. If some readers don’t like it so be it, there are more that admire and respect you for it.
Thanks for sharing Nicole. It’s sad when the ugly side of the internet rears it’s head in unexpected places. But it does happen. You have so much to be proud of. Keep the beautiful posts coming!
Nicole I guess I am a lone dissenter here, you have a lovely blog and I appreciate all your hard work, but I don’t come to ready decorating blogs for politics anything. Doesn’t matter if I agree with you, or disagree, I just think politics belong somewhere else..
Keep up the good work, and I am not a hater..Just a grandma who thinks politics is a personal choice and doesn’t need to be on a blog of this type..
You rock, Nicole! Brandon rocks, too! Keep going with your head held high!
Geez, I was kind of hoping you’d put MORE political stuff along with your awesome design and family entries. That 90/90 thing was so cool. I hope the haters don’t silence you! You’re the greatest! We all love your blog at my house!
Thanks for sharing this in particular and the work you do in general.
I imagine there’s a solid market for a specific how-to that you might sell as a printed and/or ebook. A year in self-employment on the web – a work & occasional personal diary with an occasional interview with other people in adjacent careers who manage to make it work. And, since by you, goes without saying that it’d be beautifully designed :)
You are amazing and I am happy to say one of the very first blogs I started to read. It has been so fun to see your life changes and see your family grow. You keep on going and you are allowed to have an opinion! It makes you a whole person…..and not everyone has to agree. They do need to show respect however! You go!
Hi Nicole. I have followed your blog for many years. I’ve long known that you and I fall on different ends of the political spectrum, but in spite of this I’d like to think that we could be friends in real life. I’m always up for a civil discourse! Anyway, I think it’s great that you and Brandon have found a way to provide for your family while still doing what you love. Cheers!
I also forgot to mention a shout-out to Brandon. I come from parents who are teachers (teaching Child Development no less) and many statistics show that fathers who stay home with their children during their formative years (0-5 especially) raise more well adjusted children and have a stronger bond than most. Best of luck to you and your family, you’re doing an amazing job!
Congrats Nicole!! That’s awesome news and good for you. (Also, boo on the mean people, I think you should shop more, you have excellent taste.)
you go girl!
Nicole, Kudos for being honest and breaking the mold. Love reading your more personal posts :) Keep ’em coming!
best!
Nicole, haters are gonna hate. Keep doing what you do. We love and support you!
I think that person wanted to pry. It was a little bit unclear from the last post how your family was going to pay the bills. So insulting you was their way of making you spill the beans. Still what a @$/!! Totally mean and uncalled for. People need to mind their own business and not get so upety. No one is forcing them to read your charming, well designed, well maintained and interesting blog.
Good for you! What a great ole model you are for your kids, and the rest of us! You go girl! And how lucky of you to have such a supportive husband!? Thanks for sharing.
You know, Nicole, I find your work life as fascinating as your blog (and I think I’ve been reading your blog pretty much since the beginning). You’ve created such a unique and imaginative way of making a living. I have nothing but admiration for you and your lovely family.
Keep up the great work and don’t let the negatives get you down. You are a real trailblazer. And so is your dear husband.
You are making a great job! It is so enjoyable to come visit and read your blog. You deserve evey bit of your success!
Good for you Nicole! You can’t please everyone, so why not try to please yourself.
Congratulations on all your success! I’m in a different field but am currently the sole breadwinner and I understand the pressure.
I missed the original political post so I just skimmed the comments. I doubt I could have bitten my tongue and responded with as much grace and good humor as you did. I also follow Capitol Hill Style. I have different political views than that blogger and her opinions are occasionally shared because of the nature of her blog. Despite that, I still read it because she respects other viewpoints and the content of her blog is just too amazing to miss. Hopefully, those who had a negative reaction to your link will come to realize the same thing applies to you.
Nicole – I have immense respect for couples who don’t let being straightjacketed into traditional the male/female roles determine their lives. And I thank you for your honest post. It makes you more relatable when we see that your life is not all “shiny and perfect” (just like us!)
Good for you Nicole. Be you. And be proud. Woot!
What all the nice people already said! But really, what happened to civil discourse? When did it become acceptable to spew and hate those with a different political view? I read blogs from people who are conservative, liberal, republican, democrat, independent, mormon, baptist, catholic, muslim, hindu, black, white,pro-homeschool, pro-traditional school, creative and not so creative. I may not agree with every opinion hat every author has, but I usually learn something from them all and it helps me to understand their viewpoint. Long live free speech! Celebrate our differences!
Nicole, you don’t have to justify your financial situation to anyone. Your husband paid into the system and he deserves to collect what contributed (like the rest of us). You just keep doing what you are doing and don’t mind the distraction.
I think it took GUTS for you to put that link on your blog. It also takes GUTS to blog and put yourself out there for the world to judge. You don’t have to justify to anyone how you, or your family, spends your money. Social Security, Medicaid, Medicare and unemployment are all safety nets that were developed by LIBERALS because we recognize that sometimes, bad things happen to good people, and we have to help each other out. We are all in this together and sometimes, it takes a little while to pull yourself up by your bootstraps, and some people (disabled, children, elderly) won’t ever be able to pull themselves up by their bootstraps. We have to help each other. That’s what it’s all about! Not judging others. I have visited your blog several times but never officially “followed” you. I am officially one of your proud blog followers now. You go girl! We’ve got your back.
Nicole, I love your blog and I’m so happy to have found it. You are an inspiration! Creative work, kids and a husband! It’s so much work and now you get paid. It’s a great accomplishment. I did like to hear about where you started. It’s encouraging. You are one of my favorite blogs. Loving your striped dresses lately. Cheers!
Thank you for sharing such intimate details of your life with us, and boo to whomever felt the need to so cruely rain on your parade. Go you for doing such an amazing job and being able to support your family with your blog and freelance writing!
Wow, thank you for sharing, but truly it’s really not my business how you make your money! I’m sorry you were insulted with a bunch of political rhetoric. People want to jump to illogical conclusions. Honestly, I find it downright hateful that someone insulted you and your husband. You have the right to post who you are voting for–it’s America people, last time I checked it was a free country. Long live the right to vote!
I only know you through your blog, but I’m proud of you. This year my husband quit his (very unhappy) job to pursue music full time. My little Etsy shop and upcycled clothing business has taken off, and right now it’s the only income we have. It’s not nearly enough, and we don’t have insurance, but it’s kind of amazing to even consider that I could be the breadwinner. It’s been a big shift at our house. I can’t overstate that. But it’s also been a pretty amazing journey. So happy for you, Nicole… keep up the great work!
Nicole, I am sorry that someone lashed out at you so viciously. Thank you for sharing openly and honestly about a situation that is really none of our business. How exciting that things are working out for you and your family!
1) That link was awesome
2) I like to know my bloggers politics
4) Anyone who says this is not the type of blog for that is being silly, this is YOUR life/lifestyle! This is the “type” of blog for everything anf anything that you have to say!
5) CONGRATS cause the whole situation that you guys have going on sounds preeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeety awesome.
I am just catching up on my blog reading, so I am a little late to comment on this. As total strangers, your financial situation is none of our business and yet you have shared such a personal part of your life with elegance and candor. I am sorry that your passing reference to a very interesting political website caused such a firestorm of hate. Even if people disagree with your political beliefs, hatred is not an acceptable response, and I am really sorry. You handled the whole thing with such grace. xoxo
[…] lastly, Nicole of Making It Lovely wrote a post this past week that only made my respect for her grow even more. I’m disgusted that she had […]
unemployment is called “unemployment insurance” for a reason – you pay into it. it’s amazing how ignorant people can be about the so-called “forty-seven percent.” you deserve to collect that! and most people who complain about unemployment have likely never been laid off. good for you for making it work.
Amazing history you must be so proud !
After reading it I feel more motivated and inspired. You and your husband are such a wonderful team <3
I just read some of the comments from that post. What a bunch of meanies! Whatever, your blog is awesome and you are one talented lady.
Party on, Nicole!
Way to go, mama!! I really enjoy your work, so thanks!
I think you are amazing…have for years. Keep doing what you are doing…no press is bad press even from haters!
I love your blog and appreciate all the hard work you have put into it. Keep up the great work!
GO YOU! You are just living your life. People need to get over themselves.
I am very sad that you feel the need to justify yourself. There will always be trolls, darlin’. People who never ‘get’ that we live and write how we do because it makes us happy and is ours means to an end that is soul satisfying. I’m proud of you. We’re so close in age and working hard through our DREAMS to support our families whereas a lot of people would take completely unsatisfying jobs to do that. Good for you.
Why others would feel entitled to judge your family’s finances and choices through the window that is your blog I don’t know. It is only a window: where closets are always perfectly organized, children dressed like perfect models of behavior and every project ends in a perfect after photo. As readers we thrive on this limited perspective. Like a perfect book that tells only part of a story and inspires us, we know its not the whole story or even completely real, but we enjoy it nonetheless.
All I can say is “good for you” you should feel incredibly proud of all you have done. I’m sure it’s not always easy so celebrate the good days and keep doing what you do.
Ay, ay, ay… half the country is NUTS. :) Don’t let them get you down. Congratulations on your success!
you know, I’m not one to comment on blogs. But THIS post…I couldn’t resist. When my friend’s fb status update saying “I have cancer” was eclipsed in comments by her status update saying, “I’m watching the VP debate with my parents and why does Joe Biden have to laugh like that?”, I was just so….SAD. And this is sad, too. And it reminds me of that last sad, and I had to comment. I don’t know when politics became so bitter, so divisive and so overwhelming. It’s okay, world. It’s okay if you don’t agree with someone. It’s okay if they don’t agree with you. That doesn’t make it okay for YOU to insult them/their mothers/ad nauseum. Remember, for ages people didn’t talk about politics or religion at the dinner table FOR A REASON. And that reason still holds true. There ARE other things that are more important: personal relationships, the sources of things you enjoy (whether that be a blog or something else). Take a deep breath and BE POLITE or just can it. Your opinion need not ALWAYS be aired.
This post brought a tear to my eye! It is women like you that serve as an inspiration for relative newbie bloggers like myself! So thank you! And congratulations on all your accomplishments.
Hi Nicole, I’ve been following your blog for a few years now but I never commented before. I just want to give you a word of support, my country is going through a major economic crisis so I really know how it is to live with the stress of financial instability.
After all this years I still can’t believe people are so nasty online.
I wish you and your family the best and keep up the good work. :)
You go girl. Y’all are lucky to have each other and those beautiful babies! I hope the little people with insulting comments don’t get to you for long. I know I would be arguing with them repeatedly in front of the bathroom mirror, wasting time, and raising my stress level for no reason. I hope that’s not you. You are so fantastic.
Nicole,
I just found your blog on the link of YHL, which I follow daily.
While sitting here having my coffee this a.m, I just skimmed through page after page..and found this post…
I just wanted to drop you a note of admiration and a sisterly-hi-5!!!
My husband lost his job in August 2009. We weren’t really prepared to be “one income” at that time, but I am an RN with plenty of opportunity to work overtime to make extra money and make ends meet.
He suffered a few months of depression, and he too, had to go on unemployment for a short time while he searched (unsuccessfully) for another job. He held a bachelor’s degree in business at that time, but literally couldn’t even find a job at our local Wal-mart.
What we found was that this was actually a door that opened for him to find what he truly wanted to do, which was become a school teacher. With my encouragement, he went back to school and got his Master’s degree in education. Three long years later, he just started his first teaching job, and couldn’t be happier.
It was a tough three years, but I wouldn’t change it for anything… because it made us stronger as a couple, gave him the chance to follow his dreams, and now we have a really great sense of who we are, and how we can work together through anything.
I am proud of anyone who can adapt to the changes and challenges that being “unemployed” brings, and my hope is that anyone that falls on harder times will lean on each other and try to make it as positive an experience as possible. My husband “loosing his job” turned out to be a gift and a blessing.
Best of Luck to you and your husband,
With joy,
Natalie In Oklahoma
Thanks, Natalie. We’re finding that it has worked out for us too. I’ve found that this story is happening and has happened to a lot of us out there.
[…] full-force, brought about amazing things, but it was scary too. I was the sole breadwinner — realizing a dream of mine to support the family — but I had plenty of fears and doubts. I questioned my past academic failures and […]
[…] 2012 – Brandon officially became a stay-at-home-dad, and I became the sole breadwinner. It hasn’t been easy, but I’m so thankful to have been able to make it […]
I love your blog, its an inspiration! The economy forces us to find new ways to put food on the table. The way you got it and works for you and your familly is the right way for you and your beloved ones right now. Go ahead girl and don’t look behind!
[…] find my footing with the blog and its potential to support us, and in September 2012, I wrote about our decision for Brandon to stay home and watch the kids while I worked full-time on the […]
I am just catching up on some of these older posts, but I have to tell you that your story is so inspiring. I so appreciate the fact that you are willing to share these details of your life and finances with your readers. I hope to someday be able to start a family and can’t fathom not working on my blog or design projects… but my hubby wants to start a family sooner than later. He jokes about wanting to be a ‘stay at home dad’ and it has always terrified me- the thought of being the sole provider for the family. Your drive and passion has really encouraged me today. Thank you!
This sits really poorly now that you’ve bought a $700,000 mansion that you’re filling with brand new furniture. :/
I’ve addressed concerns like yours here. I’ve worked incredibly hard, replacing Brandon’s lost income and then some, and we are now doing well financially. I wrote that post before the Q4 hit, and that period was a huge turning point for the business of the blog. I know that you left your comment anonymously, so I’m not sure that you will be back to read further, but if you see this, please know that I have always been honest and transparent when discussing personal matters.
Thank you for your inspiring post!!
S
It’s great to see that you’ve been able to provide for your family. Some people might see is as unconventional and it saddens me that your received bad comments. I’ve loved seeing your blog and family grow throughout the years and I’ve come to look forward your post about your beautiful house and adorable family. It’s a normal thing in life to go through difficulties and its great to see someone get through it with such a positive attitude.
Best of luck to you and your family!
xoxo
Geysel