I know I haven’t written anything about our situation since I mentioned it upon returning from Alt Summit. It’s been stressful, to be honest, and easier to not dwell on. Our roles, our daily routines, and our financial outlook all changed overnight, and we’re all (the kids, too) still adjusting.
I’ve had an assistant since October, Valerie, coming three days a week for six hours a day. She had been helping with some of the administrative blog work (setting up Facebook giveaways and responding to advertising inquiries), but she also helped me a lot with Eleanor and August. Now, with Brandon home, we need her less (and it was suddenly hard to pay someone for 18 hours a week). Valerie has been great, and happily flexible in regards to hours, so she’s staying on board but mostly working from home.
The kids have benefitted from more time with their daddy, but even though that’s a good thing, it has still been an adjustment. Brandon and I have different parenting styles in some ways. Eleanor and August do well with routines – a fairly predictable structure to their day – and things have shifted all of a sudden. They’re fine (we all are), but it’s something I think about. I’m also working more, and for longer stretches during the day, and my work/life balance feels out of whack.
I’m not able to be the sole breadwinner in the family. Not yet, anyway… but things are going well. I have my writing jobs at Family Style on Babble and at My Colortopia. I accept advertising on Making it Lovely directly for small businesses (e.g. Etsy shops), and through Federated Media for larger companies. I also work with sponsors. In fact, I’ll be heading out to San Francisco on Thursday for business. I’ll be lining up new sponsored content for the blog, and also pitching some new ideas with my team at FM.
Sometimes a brand’s sponsorship can be looked at as a commercial at the beginning or end of a post, similar to the way you may see a show “brought to you by XYZ.” In those cases, I’m not required to (or even asked to) write about the brand. The topic may be tangentially related, but the post is then completely up to me. The other type of sponsorships that I’m interested in facilitating are more closely tied to the brand involved, but they would allow for some fun projects. I’d love to do more home makeovers for readers (free of charge to the recipient), but for that to happen, we need a budget. I have other ideas in the works as well, and I’ll be doing my best to make them a reality.
We’ve talked about reopening Pink Loves Brown, with Brandon running it, or having him contribute more heavily to Making it Lovely. There are benefits to both, but clear drawbacks and concerns as well. If we pursue those options, we would lose the financial stability we used to have, and at the same time, we would need to secure independent health insurance. We would also no longer be able (in good conscience) to receive unemployment benefits, and that would be a further difficulty for us right now.
I do want to thank you all for the support you’ve shown us. Especially as we figure out our direction in the wake of Brandon’s job loss, but before that, too. I want you to know that it’s greatly appreciated. I’m lucky, even in the more difficult times, to have such an amazing community, and to have been able to craft this life with my family.
160 comments
Rebecca
Oh, unemployment sucks.
I am so glad that you and Brandon are working through it,
as best as you can.
I was out of work for two years,
and it was incredibly difficult.
But?
You will get through this.
You will.
Love to you and your family–
I hope the new normal becomes employed normal very, very soon. :)
StickyCake
Thank you for sharing to us your troubles, I hope they are resolved as soon as possible.
Good Luck, sincerely. I love your work and I follow your blog with great admiration.
Buona fortuna e in bocca al lupo!
Mae
I’m so sorry for your struggles. My husband is in his second round of unemployment. Wall Street has not been kind to us. We are considering large changes; a career change, a move accross the country. None can be taken lightly with four children in tow. I appreciated your candor. Good Luck and God Bless your family.
Dariela
I’m sure you guys will make it, you have so much you offer here and you are always sharing all your info.
I also work from home on graphics and blogging and we’ve been very tight for about a year or so, it’s hard even though my husband does have a job but like you say, I don’t want to give up the time I spend with the kids and schedule flexibility. Glad you are committed to your blog cause I’ll keep coming to read you, you are so inspiring! Good luck to Brandon finding a new job.
Emily
I know how tough it is when work and money stresses are combined with having a young family and your own business. Change and uncertainty of what next are always challenging but when you are managing change for yourself and your family it is even more difficult.
It sounds like you are in a good position in terms of knowing what you and your family need/want, and I hope that you can all work through this together and reach a better, calmer place soon.
Sending love and positive thoughts x
Laura @ Lolalina
So tough. I know; my hubby was laid off a few weeks after our baby was born and it took a year to find another permanent position – he was able to temp in the meantime, but as you say, COBRA is no joke, so it felt like a tiny trickle of money. Financial worries suck, there’s just no other way to say it.
I’m glad to hear you have some options to consider, and…should you decide to take on new web design clients, I would be VERY interested!
xoxo Laura
becky
Nicole I am so sorry to hear about what you are going through and I just wanted to say that I am thinking of you.
Becky
Imogen
Thank you for sharing your story. I felt compelled to simply comment you and your family on how you have been able to cope with such a drastic change and adapt. I know the future is uncertain (as it always is) but your optimism and commitment shines through. Sending more optimistic vibes from Australia. x
Izabela
Nicole, I can totally relate to your struggle between the security of 9 to 5 job and doing creative although non-traditional kind of work. Two and a half years ago I was at the end of my pregnancy and I had a vision of quiting the job I didn’t like to stay home, raise my son and working from home by pursuing my creative passion. I had a PLAN! But then my husband was laid off, and soon after had to go thru a spine surgery. To support us I had to put aside my dreams of quitting the 9-to-5, and go back to the job I didn’t like. Fast-forward two+ years: my husband is still unemployed and I am still at the same job. But I did not give up my dreams. I have recently started a blog, and I plan to open a store and offer classes. I am determined to make it happen! And all that to say THANK YOU! Thank you for all the inspiration, information and talent that you so generously share with us. It is thanks to your blog that I got the courage to take the first step to see what happen.
I know at first it is a shocker, having lost the stability of your husband’s income and having him at home. But sounds like you have lots of ideas (not surprisingly!) to make this work. It might get tough, and then it gets even tougher, but in the end things have a way of working themselves out. All the best to you and thanks again for all that you do!
erin / dfm
Nicole! I love your transparency and vulnerability in writing all of this. I (along with so many of your loyal readers!) know good things are going to come out of this transition and I can’t wait to see what those things are.
We’re rooting for you, love!
Carla Sumka
There’s no doubt things will work out for you and your family. You’re clearly creative and talented–it just might take time for the right fit. I work full time from home and husband works part time at a radio station. With two kids, always tough to go without dual full time paychecks, but we’ve learned to live with less. He watches the kids during the day and works evenings and overnights. I’m sure your husband will enjoy the time home until a new job comes along. You just keep doing what your doing and it’s going be fabulous. And if it’s not, there’s no hope for any of us who aren’t as creative and talented as you :) BTW- when you visit with Federate Media, tell my pal Helen Jane that I say hello please. We grew up in the same hometown, went to summer camps and (some of) college in Wisconsin together. She’s creative and inspirational, like you.
spark
Hi Nicole, Just wanted to let you know that I really hope karma or whatever gods there are step in for you and provide you and your family lots of lovely opportunities. I will always remember your kindness when I was 9 months pregnant and OBSESSING over a nursery chair (eames rocker) and you answered my question so quickly. It was very personal and I felt very blessed that my personal style icon :) would actually respond! (yes I was extremely hormonal being 2 weeks overdue). My husband has gone back to full-time study so we have no income for the next 6 months. I’ve have gone back out to work for a couple of days a week. It has been hard but not as hard as expected. Hope this stage in life goes smoothly for you all. xxx
barbara@hodge:podge
Wow, what a life changer. My husband was laid off last Tuesday from his corporate job of 21 years. Didn’t see that coming! I blog, but just for “fun”, no income from that. Right now we are figuring out what the best route is regarding our financial compensation from the company but the scary part is not knowing what the future holds!
Good luck to you and your husband, we know what you are going through and feeling!
Hugs.
Mefi
Thanks for sharing. Your blog is awesome and will continue to enjoy your posts.
Holly
Good luck!
In the 10+ years that I’ve been married, my husband has had various stages of employment and retraining. What I’ve learned is that it provides our kids with an opportunity to build a closer relationship with their father, and that it teaches them flexibility by watching their parent shift roles from time to time and having to deal with those changes.
These changes always bring adventure! I hope yours is a good one.
Andrea
Thank you for sharing your story, Nicole. Having gone through a similar situation, I know that it’s hard. It’s hard to think about, let alone share on your blog. While it really sucks, you discover so much. You discover things that you never thought you can do, or things that you’ve forgotten that you are capable of. From reading your post, I can see that you are realizing all the things that you can do – which is awesome. The hardest part for me what the uncertainty of it all, especially with a family. I will be thinking of you guys, you’re future will be bright!
Amy
I just had to add my voice to all of those thanking you for being so honest and articulate about your experience. It’s hard, but when I worked for an organization that supported women entrepreneurs we’d call these moments “time to put on the big girl panties.”
As it happens, I worked at that non-profit for 4 years, moved on, and was immediately laid off about a year ago. My partner and I have been together for 7 years but she and I don’t live together and we support ourselves totally independently (including both owning apartments). When I got laid off I made the decision to start a business consulting. It was hard, complicated, and frightening, but there is no way I could have learned as much as I did as fast as I did.
I hope that you find, like I did, that you are smart and strong enough to get through whatever life throws at you…and that being the bread winner feels pretty damn good!
Hally
I know I’m just “one little ol’ voice”, but I think it would be AH-MAZ-ING, to hear more from Brandon on your blog. I’m obsessed with decorating, designing, and redecorating and I often think it would be nice to have a male perspective other than my husband usual answer of ‘eh, whatever’. It would also be cool to have him do some style posts since he seems to have quite a bit of style sense as shown in your photographs. Anyway, I think it’s something to consider. I think it would be great!! Can’t wait to hear what you all decide to do. Good luck, and just know were all going through hard times as well so we definitely understand and can empathize. Much love, girlie!
Lisa
That must have been a difficult post to write, Nicole. You are an inspiration always + esp. in these difficult times. Wishing you the best of luck in finding your voice + stride moving ahead!
Mona Idriss
A lovely post. The photographs are amazing!! Why not open up an etsy shop to supplement some of your income? You have amazing typography skills and you are a great photographer!!
mirka
With all these difficulties, it sounds like you have a plan and I wish you lots of luck in getting sponsors and advertisements. This is a great website. You have done a fantastic job. I wish you all the best and thank you for sharing and being real.
Rebecca
Best of luck to your family!! I know what you mean about having your husband around sort of throwing off the schedule with your kids… My husband works from home 2 days a week, and although I love having him around, things feel more chaotic. :) Hope you get things sorted out soon!
lindsay
As corny as it is, cliches are cliches for a reason. What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger, and you’ll only look back at this later and see how you all grew and changed from it. It’s impressive for you to put yourself on the line with your readers and be so candid, it really helps us feel like you’re a “real person” and not just some perfect wife/blogger/momma. I hope your stormy seas calm sooner rather than later. You have lots of people rooting for you and your family. It will work out.
Jessie
Stay positive and everything will fall into place!! :) I have had similar things happen to me in the past years. I always tell people that the things that seem the “worse” in life, usually end up being the best in the end. We grow and learn from everything. You know this already though, because you have a great outlook on life. *hugs*
elizabeth@lovelylittleparties
I love your positive attitude, Nicole. Thank you for being so transparent and honest with us. There are so many people in this same situation so thanks for being “real”.
Rachel May
I’m so sorry that you’re going through this right now, but I thank you for being real, open and honest. I think so many people right now are going through something similar and everyone wishes they just had a roadmap (one over here, please!) to show them the way. I’m sure you will figure it out one way or another, but I am still thinking positive thoughts for you and your family. I’m glad that in a tough situation, you’re still aware of what will and what won’t make you happy (i.e. the job stuff). It is nice to feel wanted by another company though:)
Best wishes to you all, stay strong-you got this!
kristin
take care, nicole. just wanted to send you a virtual hug. i’m a longtime reader but an infrequent commenter, who loves your blog! i have no wise words, just that i hope it all works out soon and thank you for sharing. best of luck to brandon in his job hunt!
Anonymous
Boo hoo. Wah Wah. We don’t care about your “sad” story. You seriously did a whole blog post about this?? Keep the posts about your home. No one feels sorry for you.
Sophia
You are amazing for sharing all what you are thinking of or going through in your life! And I’m sure that all the good things will come to people as smart and creative as you are. Keep Being lovely, and keep us believing in making things in our life lovely.
Donnie
Hey Nicole! I’ve been reading your blog for about three years now and I just wanted to say thank you for sharing this story. Your site has always been a source of inspiration but it is even more an inspiration now that I see your spirit and your commitment to your passion. It seems like you now have a mandate to continue to push & reach for your dreams and from the looks of things – it is well within your reach. Blessings to you and your family during this difficult time and remember, “trouble don’t last always!” ;)
Josephine
Believe it or not, I was just wondering about you and your family this morning as I drove to work (in Australia). I just wanted to say that I love what you do here, and I hope your family isn’t in limbo for too much longer! I hope the universe sorts it’s s**t out for you soon. In the meantime, I’ll keep sending the good vibes.
Zoe
How difficult for you both. I really admire you for sharing this – I would struggle, too, to put to words challenges like these in real time. I know we talked about this briefly at Alt and it didn’t seem like it was high on your list of “want-to-dos” but what about adding some web design and/or development back into your mix? I bet you could do pretty limited amounts and be quite picky about the projects you accepted and it would help the bottom line. Just a thought!
Making it Lovely
It’s definitely an option. I put a lot of time into my web design projects though, so even just taking one a month would be a big commitment.
Carol
Good for you for sticking it out! Time with your kids is precious. I’m desperately trying to get a decent part time job so I can spend more time home with mine. Hang in there we’re all rooting for you!
claire@gibsonking
Ohhhh, and check out http://www.ehealthinsurance.com. It was much cheaper than COBRA for me.
Paisley
Please shop around for the health insurance! The COBRA premium is based on the age and experience rating of Brandon’s old company. You can probably get it much cheaper on your own. Also, family coverage (at least through employer sponsored plans) tends to cost more than if you dropped one adult and bought a separate individual policy.
Megan Jean
Hi Nicole
I’m big fan of your blog and I lived in Chicago for a while in my twenties when I looked cuter in puffy coats. If Brandon is at all interested in a job in advertising (I have no idea what his profession is), my previous agency is hiring a lot of talent right now. Let me know if you’re interested and I will send you some contact info.
Best of luck,
MJ
Making it Lovely
I love describing oneself as “when I looked cuter in puffy coats.”
Brandon was in printing, managing prepress (getting files ready to go).
Megan Jean
I looked cuter in puffy coats back then and boots. Now putting on socks just seems like trouble.
As for Brandon, if he has a resume you’d like to pass along, I would certainly love to send it to Leo Burnett. They do have a studio print department that does a lot of what it sounds like Brandon does. My email is mjsovern@yahoo.com if you’d like to send it my way.
Yeah?
claire@gibsonking
I know it must be so tough for you both right now. There was a period of time when my husband and I were both un employed. Unemployment saved us and now we are both employed and don’t regret a minute of that time of our lives. We learned a lot about what we really needed financially and we also learned a lot about each other. I would have never imagined that by 29 I would have lost 2 jobs, get married, be un employed for about 2 years, change careers completely, buy a home, do a kitchen renovation and now be back on my feet again. Best of luck to you both, it will work, it always does!
Zaida
I just stumbled upon your blog recently. It’s a wonder! I’m putting you on my prayer list for great solutions and new opportunities to bubble up to the surface soon for you and your family.
Nikki
We’re in a similar position, Nicole. My husband (our family’s primary breadwinner) recently left his job. His reasons were different – he’s a musician and decided to leave a rather unhappy position in the insurance business, and sort of try out this “leap and the net will appear” thing. I have my own small etsy shop, and now I’m suddenly looking at this as not just a hobby, but a way to start seriously supplementing my family’s income. As I get busier and have some money to invest back in the business, I would LOVE to advertise on your site! In the meantime, you’re not alone… and I also know it’s a big adjustment to suddenly have so much togetherness and “help” with co-parenting. Big love to you and your family.
Making it Lovely
Thanks, Nikki. Best of luck to you both!
Flavia
I’ve been reading your blog since Sherry and John from Young House Love mentioned you a while back on their blog. Every once in a while I stop by to see what you’re up to, to “steal” some great ideas (like your business card and where you had it print p.s: I live in Chicago too) or just to feel inspired (your blog is very nice to look at). I have to confess and say that I usually don’t read the content, but today, something drew my eyes to your text and as I began reading it, I was hooked. First of all, I’d like to say how much I admire you for leaving your pride behind and sharing a bit of your life struggles with us. It’s very true when people say you learn form others mistake/struggles. So, thank you for your humbleness and generosity. Secondly, you’ve probably heard this several times, but you’re worth repeating this for: you are such a talented girl! I think you (as well as your husband) should do what your heart is telling you to do, no matter what. I understand you have to think of security and your children, but I’m sure many will agree with me, you can do it!!! Whatever it is that you guys want to do, give it a shot! Take a chance! I believe it’s always worth trying something if your heart is invested in. Lastly, I wish you all the luck in this new journey (regardless of what happens from now on). Just now you’ve created something pretty amazing with Making it Lovely and I know you have a brilliant future ahead of yourself.
xoxo, Flavia.
kate
It is such a scary time. My husband lost his job almost a year ago and I had just been diagnosed with breast cancer. Cobra is terribly expensive but after reading some of the above comments I think it’s a good idea to check on other insurance options. We bought a bank owned property to fix up- did all the work ourselves, including my getting a realtor’s license to buy and to sell it, and made out really well financially. Now we’re looking for another house to flip and quite happy in our “new life.”
You’re a fantastic children’s photographer as well as a great designer. I wish you the best!
kim
I don’t usually comment, but this post touched me with its openness and honesty. Thank you for sharing your story. I love your blog and read it every day.
Sara @ zaharadessert
Nicole, thanks for sharing your very private with us. But it is truly inspirational to read your story.
I know this sounds corny, but everything happens for a reason. So I am looking forward to hearing about your new adventures over the coming months.
Good luck
Heidi
Thank you for sharing such candid comments about your family situation.
Having been a reader of your blog for so long, I feel connected in a weird way to you and am a huge champion of Making It Lovely’s success.
I wish you much courage during this difficult time!
My husband lost his job 6 years ago, a mere two months after we had taken the leap and purchased a new house. It was a scary time.
6 years later our lives have definitely changed. He went back to school and has started a new career, but of course at a much lesser salary. The funny thing though, is that I wouldn’t trade the last 6 years or where we are at right now for anything. We’ve had to reevaluate a lot in our lives and despite the stresses we are happier people and as a couple, closer than ever.
I hope that you will continue to do what you love and find a way to keep that work/life balance in check! Your blog is always so inspiring to read and I know that you and Brandon will figure it all out!
Malayka
What an honest post! It’s definitely not easy out there at the moment. As well as running my vintage store I am also on the job hunt daily in order to live more comfortably. We complain about a lot of things here in New Zealand but we can count ourselves extremely lucky that we don’t have the same health system is in the USA. Therefore we don’t have the same insurance worries, which seems to be a massive hardship for so many people over there.
Good luck with everything, I’m sure it’s all going to fall into place. I look forward to seeing what you decide to do. x
Jill
$2600 / month for insurance, or per year? I am Canadian and don’t know about US costs. I hope everything works out for your family Nicole.
Making it Lovely
I think the person that mentioned $2600 was referring to a monthly cost. Ours isn’t that high, but it’s not far behind either.
Cecilia
kudos to you for sticking with your passion and not feeling like you have to move into a desperation plan (like a 9-5 job). you will make it work. a whole bunch of us are rooting for you. i know it’s not easy being the bread winnner or being in that place of uncertainty. best of luck as you forge your way through it :)
susie
Wishing you the best of luck with whatever comes next. You are obviously immensely talented and i have no doubt that you and your family will find whats best for you.
Deborah Wall
Sometimes the bumps in the road are the events that create magic that we couldn’t forsee. Last year we needed to close our business of 9 years and sell our house (in a most unfavourable housing market) to pay for a commerical construction job that didn’t go as planned, my daughter suffered from depression and I had a core-biopsy on my breast.
Honestly I was terrified and at times couldn’t see how we were going to make it through but we did in ways I could never of imagined. I’m know working three days a week for an upholstery business where I am doing a course and I don’t have to do bookkeeping anymore (a big Yay because I felt like it was sucking the life out of me!), my husband has a lucrative contract on the go, my daughter got to talk to a counseller about feelings she’d buried for years and we are renting a house with a view of the sea… better we learnt how resourceful we can be when we pull together and trust.
You’re talented and resourceful you I know you will come out the other side of this stronger and more aware of what you are capable of.
Cathy
I forgot to mention… regarding health insurance… we compared rates through e-surance and found rates much better than COBRA.
Cathy
Making it Lovely
Yes, it’s something I’m looking into.
Lachelle
Ah, Nicole. I feel for you. My employment status has also had its ups and downs over the past few years and I know what it’s like to go without health insurance for extended periods of time. Graphic design is not the stable job it used to be. I have no doubt that you will land on your feet and things will work out. You are amazingly talented and I’m doubly humbled that you accomplish so much while also fulfilling the role of wife and mother. You really are an inspiration to so many people. I think I probably speak for a lot of people when I say our best wishes are with you and your family.
Cathy
Thanks for sharing your story. We are in a similar position. I lost my job 2 years ago and committed to running my jewelry shop full time. Then about 4 months ago my hubby was not offered his full time position at a school district. He’s currently under-employed and receiving unemployment benefits.
I wish my income could support us both or I could figure out how to have him work on JustJaynes.com with me… but I’m not sure what part he would fill.
Good luck to you and your family. You are not alone!
Cathy
Carrie Hogan
CHANGE IS ALWAYS GOOD! IT IS HOW YOU GROW! I think you should start in kids fashion. What a fabulous Jacket on E! Can you tell me where you got it? I want in and looked for the dress from Gwen and Targets in LAs VEgas did not have it. I was bumbed! You certainly have style! Thank you.
Making it Lovely
E’s jacket was a clearance find from Boden, last year. I bought it and held onto it for a year until it fit her.
Molly the Waffler
Thank you for such an honest and generous post. I find the work/life balance incredibly hard (and I’m sure my part-time job and blogging don’t add up to as many hours you put in) and ditto for the different parenting styles. I’m all about structure (I’m a teacher after all) and my husband is all about fun and spontaneity. On the other hand, I do think it’s good for kids to get used to different styles and different ways of seeing the world. Good luck with your new plans — I’m sure they will come out beautifully.
Chris Olson
Hi Nicole,
Reading your heartfelt post brought tears to my eyes. You are such a strong and upbeat person. Thanks for sharing your lovely blog with us each day. I’m crossing my fingers (and toes) and hoping this tough situation ends up making something even more amazing and prosperous develop for all of you. Thanks again, for all you do. And hugs to you and your family.
Sending positive vibes your way!
Chris O.
Amy
My husband retired early from Microsoft, and we thought our biggest monthly expenditure would be health insurance, but we found it to be quite affordable. WAY less than the cobra we were going to do until it ran out. Find an insurance broker and get some quotes for personal insurance, it can’t hurt!
And good luck!
Reesa
Thank you for sharing on such a personal topic. I really enjoy the content you provide on this blog and other fora. I hope things quickly turn around for the better for you and your family!
Katie
Nicole,
Thank you so much for sharing that! Since losing my job after having my son, I know how hard it can be to talk about things like this, especially so publicly. I really appreciate your honest well-thought-out post on such a tough and life changing event. Good luck! It’s weird to say since I don’t know you but I feel like you guys will come out way on top of this.
Mandy@Cre8iveMotives
I just came across your blog on (Apartment Therapy’s best home design blogs nominations). I am soooo glad I found you. I will be voting for you:) Love your blog
On another note, I hope things work out for you and your family. Thank you for being so honest and sharing your personal life with us. We all have our problems. Best of luck!
Mandy
Emily
I hope things work out for you and Brandon. I have been unemployed for almost 7 months and reading your blog is one of the things that keeps me going.
Leah
Hi Nicole! Just want to thank you for your honesty and wish your family the best! So many of us can relate to your concerns right now. Your blog was one of the 1st I started following years ago and I’ve continued to enjoy it! Change is always a bit (or a lot!) scarey, but I know things will work out bc we all support you!
Deidre
Nicole,
You’ve contributed so much to my life with your talents. Your creativity and your integrity is simply from the divine. Take heart and be encouraged.
Please feel free to email me and let’s talk about what connections I have on the East Coast for you and Brandon. I believe there’s a purpose for everything even when we don’t see it.
Mwah! Love, Deedums
Cat (from FM!)
Hi Nicole,
I hope everything works out for you and Brandon. Your blog is beautiful, and we love pitching your site to clients over here at FM. Rooting for you!
Cat
Making it Lovely
Thanks, Cat! Maybe I’ll see you on Thursday?
Katie Anderson
I hope that your SF trip is successful and profitable. You’re very talented and I hope more and more brands want to collaborate with you. I am really enjoying all these authentic and transparent posts from fellow bloggers recently. I think oftentimes readers think we have it all together, but really we’re just as terrified as everyone else. Best of luck!
Jillian@TheHumbleGourmet
I completely feel for you and your family. My husband was laid off 2 years ago, and we were forced to move in with my parents. Best of luck to all of you. I’m sure that the rest of your readers would agree with me in saying that we can’t wait to hear some good news for you and Brandon.
Lora
I’m sure you’ll get a hundred suggestions about things you’ve mentioned here but one that I’d like to put forth is to check online for health insurance. You can try esurance or just google “health insurance plans”. My husband was out of work for 6 months a while ago and that’s how we handled our medical insurance. COBRA is great – if you can afford it. And not many people can long term. We were able to get a bare-bones policy (we were concerned about my husband having a heart attack from the stress of unemployment) for a family of 3 for $400/month. Far less than the $2600 for COBRA at the time. Of course the coverage wasn’t as good but it was what we needed to cover a catastrophic event should it have happened. Best wishes!
Making it Lovely
Thanks. I did look into it briefly, and you’re right. A separate health insurance plan may be less expensive than COBRA. I have concerns though because there is a preexisting condition for one of us. I know we can’t be denied because of it with the new health care reform laws, but it will still be more expensive, and we need fairly comprehensive coverage.
Kati
I second this idea! For some reason, I had always assumed that having private health insurance would be more expensive than COBRA, but boy was I wrong! We were able to save $250/month by getting insurance privately and the coverage was comparable to what we had before. We talked to a family friend who reps for different insurance companies in our state and he was able to make recommendations on the plan that would be best for us.
Emily @ Peck Life
I truly think all things happen for a reason…something wonderful and great will come of this!! PS – I wanted to take your March 13 analytics class on the AltSummit page but it doesn’t seem to be there anymore?
Making it Lovely
I asked about that today, and was told the class would be up again sometime tomorrow. I hope to see you there!
stephanie
wow. i was really moved by how open and honest you are with your readers about your current situation. it made me love your blog even more than i already do! I am in agreement with many of the other commenters that you will make it through this uncertain time based on how creative, clever, and candid you are. best of luck:)
Nuit
good luck with everything sweetie :)
jbhat
I’m glad to hear that you are adjusting and figuring it all out. For stability’s sake, I want the “normal” to come back for you, but in a new and better way. Brandon is sure to get a good gig before too long.
jbhat
Linnea
I sure enjoy reading the blog you’ve taken so much time to craft! Be encouraged: you and your hubby will get through this time. DH & I were each unemployed in the past three years – me for a year, and he for six months. We know how hard this is! You can do it. I’m happy to pray for you, if that would be encouraging to you! Let me know.
Danielle
Life can stink some times. I am glad to see you have your head above water and are tredding along fine. The most important thing to see right now, which you do, is there is food on the table, roof over your head, and the love of your family. Nicole, your blog is one of my favorites because of the stories you tell and ideas you share. Keep up the good work!
Tanya from Dans le Townhouse
Thanks for sharing such personal details. Sometimes folks gloss over the hard stuff and then it makes me feel like I’m the only one with an imperfect life. I wish the best for you and your family and, with talent like yours, I know you’ll figure out some amazing situation.
Making it Lovely
It’s hard, for me, to talk about difficult situations while I’m living through them. It helps to have a little distance to reflect and process things, and that’s why I hadn’t updated everyone on our situation until now.
casacaudill
I definitely concur with Tanya’s thoughts. It can sometimes be hard for readers of lifestyle blogs when everything that is posted is all unicorns and rainbows. While I am very sorry to hear what your family is struggling with, I feel that by honestly and openly talking about it, you’re giving your readers a better sense of the real you and that’s something we all appreciate in the blogs that keep us coming back.
Jessica
I completely agree! I appreciate your honest, open post. I’ve been a longtime reader of making it lovely and love so much of what you do. Seeing this post takes it to a new level though. I actually feel more of a connection to your words and situation. I totally understand that it’s incredibly hard to share when you’re dealing with it, but thank you for sharing it Nicole!
Marlena
Thank you for your honesty in all aspects. I wish you the best!
Dottie
Lady! As I mentioned before, I totally understand all of the feelings/issues you are facing right now as my sweetie has been unemployed for a bit. It’s tough! But hey–since you are coming to SF, I hope to see you Thursday night (wink wink) and hopefully we can chat about it in person.
Making it Lovely
Yes, I’ll see you on Thursday!
kris
Nicole,
Do you profit from having ads on your site and/or also with “click-throughs”?
I visit your site daily and if clicking an ad each day would benifit you guys I’d be glad to do that.
Making it Lovely
Not directly, but thanks. (You should check them out though if you see something that catches your eye — I’m appreciative of my advertisers.)
kris
benefit. ugh…it’s monday.
Klyn
Praying for your sweet family.
Caitlin
You’re honesty and perseverance is so inspiring! You are infinitely talented :)
christy
I wish you bith all of the best & personally know what this struggle is like. My husband was laid off at the end of 2009 and while he has been able to find work here & there it unfortunatley was not stable. I am very happy to say that since late 2011 things have definitely turned around & while the salary isn’t what he was making before we are comfortable. If anything this experience has definitely taught us to be more resourceful than ever. Best wishes to you all.
laura parke
hi nicole, thank you for the update. i’ve been thinking about you and your family since the news last month. it’s not an easy decision to make on where to go from here, but i hope you find peace with whatever decision is made. i love your blog and admire your strength during this time.
Helen Jane
Although it can feel crushing – oh, man, I know crushing financial worries – I think wonderful opportunities are going to come up for you. Much love through this patch of constraints.
Megan
That is rough. Hang in there! You guys will get through it.
Janet
Nicole,
I enjoy your blog and wanted to tell you that you and Brandon will be okay!!
My husband and I were in the same predicament a year ago, we both lost our jobs at the same time back in 2008, just months after having our baby. It was definitely an adjustment for us financially, but luckily, just like you, I was able to find a decent 9-5 job that afforded me to be closer to home and to bring home enough income and benefits for our family. Because I found a job sooner, I told my husband to take his time in finding a new job this time around and to enjoy our time with our baby.
It was a huge sacrifice to be the one to go to work, but for the first time in my husband’s career, he was able to stay and take care of things that I would have normally had to handle on my own, AND appreciate all the time it took to take care of it!
Financially, we made adjustments that we thought we couldn’t make considering all the things we loved to buy. The “downtime” really taught us how to scale back and only purchase and buy things we absolutely needed, with a splurge here and there, but quite honestly the experience taught us both to not be wasteful and much more mindful of what we needed to spend on.
Count this as a blessing that the kids get to hang out with their dad more. My husband finally found a job after 2 years of freelancing, and he tells me everyday how much he valued the time he spent with our daughter.
If I could be some help in finding a job prospect for Brandon, I’m known to find leads for friends of mine pretty quickly!
Best of luck to you and the family!
bethany
You handle things with such grace and professionalism, Nicole. For someone that is younger and struggling with the same issues of employment for my husband, I really admire your attitude. You have so many plates spinning – parenthood, marriage, and all the little plates that make up your career – and despite how hard it may feel, please know that you’re handling it better than most. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family as you keep looking for the next thing.
Elena
Nicole, this blog has been such an inspiration to me. I’ve had dreams about your library! Honestly. I’m finally in the position to create my own this spring and I’ll be using yours as a guide. You are so talented and there are great things on the horizon for you and your family. It’s cliche but it’s always darkest before the dawn. So in other words…you are ’bout to blow up! Stay focused and remember who you are and you can’t go wrong. :o)
Sarah
Nicole, I too admire your candor…I have been in that situation myself as I was out of work for close to a year about 2 years ago. The unemployment is a big help, but it is the feeling of helplessness and lack of direction that I really dislike about not working. Keep the ‘doors open’ and opportunities will present themselves, especially in the internet world. Just remember that things never stay the same, so your circumstances will change.
Melissa
Nicole,
I’ve been meaning to email you to see how things have been. I can definitely tell there’s been a difference around here. Your blog has always been awesome, but I can tell you’ve been working harder on it. I hope you figure out what your next steps are.
Chris and I are in the same boat, too. He lost his job about 2 weeks ago (not a huge surprise). It’s been a huge adjustment. He’s such a great daddy, but we definitely have different parenting styles. I’m WAAY more scheduled (and strict) than he is.
It’s been a blessing that he lost is job in some ways. He can now work full-time on developing my calligraphy site, which I’ve been meaning to launch for the last year. With him unemployed we’re able to make it much more sophisticated than we had originally envisioned. It’s great. However, we don’t know if we should continue in the freelance vein or if Chris should seek out a new job. He’s got an interview today, so I guess we’ll see how that goes and decide from there.
Anyway, I just wanted to comment and say you’re awesome and (at the risk of sounding awkwardly religious) I’m praying for you. God loves you and I know he’ll help your sweet family come out of this on top.
Making it Lovely
It’s really nice to hear from you. I’ve been thinking about you and your sweet family too, and hoping everything is all right with you.
If Brandon hadn’t lost his job, my redesign would have taken longer since I wouldn’t have been able to devote as much time to working on it. So in the same way that you’re able to get your calligraphy site going, sometimes good things come out of bad situations. There’s so much to think about though — and we’re in such similar situations. I’ll be hoping for the best for both of us!
Patricia
I’ve always admired your work ethic and consistency—you are truly gifted. I’m sure that you’ll pull through this with flying colors. I’m certainly rooting for your family and for the continued success of everything you do. Hang in there!
Making it Lovely
Thanks, Patricia.
Adventures in Dressmaking
Best wishes to all of you right now. I’m sure it will all work out in the end, better than you could have hoped, right?? It’s hard to believe that now, at least in my experience–my husband is out of work and has been for a while, so I work full-time and blog on the side, and I really can’t wait until he finds a real job! But in the meantime, sounds like you’re doing the best you can and keeping a good attitude. I’m glad you’re committed to blogging because I’ve loved your blog for years! Best of luck, =)
Jennifer
Unemployment is hard! Many of us have been there for a period of time in the last few years. Here’s hoping that it will lead to something new and exciting you would not have otherwise explored. Hang in there!
Truly Smitten
Hoping everything will work out for the best!! Hang in there! And I’m glad you aren’t going to cut back on your blog bc I (and many readers) would be devastated!
amanda
I’m confused regarding your shop pink loves brown…is it closed due to extended maternity leave, or is it closed for good because the blog is your main job now?
Making it Lovely
I closed it for maternity leave, thinking it would be a quick break, but then things have been crazy around here for one reason or another. The blog is a better source of income for me, so that’s where I’ve been focusing my efforts.
Val
Hang in there. I think you are fabulous and things will work out..somehow, some way.
JayEssJay
I’m with you. I’ve been out of work for almost a year… although we always find a way to make ends meet at the end of the month, it’s really starting to take it’s toll on me. I’m ready for routine. I’m ready for the challenges and learning opportunities that employment provides. I’m ready for cheaper health insurance. I’m ready to be able to spend at Target without thinking about it. I’m ready to treat myself to a nice dinner out. I tell myself it will happen when it’s supposed to happen, but that sure is difficult when I want it to happen so badly.
Christina
I hate it when people offer unsolicited advice, but I’m going to be a hypocrite and do it anyways as I’ve been thinking about your situation for a few hours now and have two suggestions.
First, I think it would be great if you reopened the shop. I’ve wanted to purchase some items from Pink Loves Brown since you went on maternity leave over a year ago. I’m sure there are more of us out there, particularly those who discovered your blog more recently, who are in the same boat.
Second, at the risk of upsetting Valerie, have you considered turning your needs for her into an internship? Many universities allow their students to take unpaid internships during the school year and/or summer and turn them into credit, which would be mutually beneficial to the student as they get course credit and work experience and you as you would no longer have to pay someone. They could not, obviously, help you with Eleanor and August, but certainly work on growing readerships, managing advertisers, etc. would appeal to a student majoring in media and culture or public relations or advertising/marketing, for example. (I would love to do something like this but, alas, I am in Boston and you are in Chicago.) It would also help you cross mentor somebody off your lovely life list.
I do love Making it Lovely and look forward to reading each post so I hope you won’t be too offended by my (unsolicited) suggestions. Just thought I’d throw them out there. Good luck through this difficult time.
Making it Lovely
I’ve considered internships before, and it’s not something I’d rule out, but I like the stability of having one person on board to help. And yes, I’m sure there are people waiting for the reopening of Pink Loves Brown. I get emails all the time asking when it will be up and running again.
Timmi
I also agree with Heather about the insurance, sometimes company insurance isn’t always the best. I have private insurance for myself and my kids while my husband stayed on through his company. Why? Well its a good $100 less a month that way. We get the same benefits (except maternity care, but we have decided not to have anymore) we went with our friend who deals with insurance and who we have all our insurance through so we get a bundle discount as well. Just do your research.
Hang in there and be thankful for your family, its what has gotten us through crappy times of uncertainty, and has made us happier because of it. We are slowly making our way out of the uncertainty phase with many “what ifs” still unanswered. We look to ourselves and think outside the box to get things done. We have gone without for so long we don’t even miss them. Just hug your loved ones to reassure yourself that you are doing a great job.
Sucar
Do NOT stop blogging! You have a gift for finding and organizing items that I wouldn’t find otherwise. Your value as a marketer is very high. Plus, you brighten my days immeasurably with your humor. Adding you guys to my prayer list for amazing things to come your way. Expect great things.
Danielle
I wish you and your family all the best while you work thru this. I hope your husband is able to find the job he wants – and sooner the better. I know we’re still suffering thru the recesssion here in the midwest (we’re in Detroit) – fingers crossed that there’s light at the end of this tunnel!
Edith
I have always loved your blog and I hope everything works out for you and your family :)
Jill Browning
As always, you’re doing a great job. I hope things fall into place for you soon!!
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