Me My Life Style

On Wearing Sequins

Under the “Just Plain Fun” section of my Lovely Life List is this item: Wear a sequined dress to a party. (Because doesn’t it sound like just plain fun?) It seems like the kind of thing you could cross off with a trip to the mall and a date night, except there’s more to it than that.

This post started a few days ago as a fun, frivolous post with five or six sequined dresses. There would have been a sentence or two at the top, an image with all of the options, then numbered links. My favorite dress of the bunch was this one, but at $300 I wouldn’t have bought it. Today, I noticed that it had been marked down by nearly half, putting it squarely in the price range I was comfortable with. Yet I hesitated.

So then I thought, hey, instead of showing a bunch of pretty dresses today, why not expose some insecurities instead?

See, I’m not going to go super cheap on the dress because the really inexpensive dresses tend to be sized for juniors. I’m smaller than I used to be, but I’m certainly not juniors sized (or shaped). I figured I’d probably go for something in the $150 range, but if I’m going to spend that on a dress, it needs to be for something that I’ll get more than one wear out of. I’ve had it in my head that I would hold off on buying pricier clothes until I’m at a settled weight… but I am. Just not at the one I wanted to be at.

I was a size 12 when I got married, eight years ago. I was a 14 before I got pregnant with Eleanor in 2007, and a size 18 (and over two hundred pounds) after I had her. I lost weight and went back down to a 12, then promptly got pregnant again in 2010 with August. Back up to a 16. Now I’m down to a size 10 and have been for a while. I should be happy with that, because it took a lot of work and discipline, but to be totally honest, I had hoped to get down to a size 8 before reinvesting in a new wardrobe.

A size 8, thin to some, chubby to others, feels like a healthy, attainable goal. And one that I’ve failed to reach.

There is no end to the affirmations I could invoke to boost my esteem, but I don’t hate, or even particularly dislike my body. I am slightly overweight though, and it’s because I don’t eat well. I’ve been at roughly the same weight for about a year now. Running and roller derby (and laying off the peanut butter) did help me go from a size 12 down to a 10, but I feel stuck. Any weight loss I experience moving forward, if at all, will be gradual.

XO Sequins

Funny how we set limits for ourselves, even for something as silly as whether or not one can buy a fun new dress. I’ve wanted to be that girl in sequins for years. The one who is effortlessly confident and who feels comfortable enough with herself to wear garment that not only shows her figure, but flaunts it. I was waiting to buy the pretty dress I’d always wanted until I was at an arbitrary size, but perhaps it’s time to stop waiting.

I’m teaching an online class next week for Alt Summit, all about what to wear to the event. If you’ve been, or even if you’ve only seen photos in recaps, you know it’s a pretty stylish crowd. The last night of the conference features a dozen mini parties, and attendees flit about between them all. It’s a sea of glitter, silk, and yes, sequins. I don’t know yet which form of sparkle and shine I’ll be sporting, but I did order a dress.

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  • jess weliwitigoda
    December 4, 2012 at 11:09 am

    I know exactly what you mean! I do the same thing when it comes to weight. Now, I’m down to my goal weight after going gluten-free two months ago. But instead of going out to buy the new jeans I’ve been waiting for (something perfect and celebratory), my frugality is taking over. I wish I could just accept my size AND my pocketbook. If it’s not one thing, it’s another.

  • Julia
    December 4, 2012 at 11:09 am

    I LOVE this post! It’s honest, friendly and a bit fun – I suspect qualities of yourself shine through in your writing :)

    I don’t think sequin-shyness is just a body thing – it’s an overall confidence thing. I’m petite by most standards, and had a black sequinned number hanging in my closet for 2 years before stepping out in it last NYE. I knew it looked good, figure-wise, but you cannot hide from anyone while glimmering like a disco ball. I needed to be in a happy place before I could wear it like it deserved to be worn; I did, and it was the most fun ever.

    SO, flaunt your sequins with a giant, open-mouthed smile and head tossed back in a laugh – sequins always look good when you look happy.

  • elise
    December 4, 2012 at 11:13 am

    Thank you for this. I lost a lot of my baby weight last year, and felt confident putting on whatever I wanted. Now that the scale is creeping back up due to an exercise slump and poor eating, I don’t feel so great about what I’ll wear to the Christmas party. I love feeling and looking good when I’m taking care of myself, but I’m learning to show up and be present even when I’m not at my ideal. The fact of the matter is, once you are dressed and out the door, you will look and feel fabulous, and that’s what people will respond to — not the doubting inner voice in your head.I look forward to seeing you in the dress!

  • Valerie Parizeault
    December 4, 2012 at 11:14 am

    Gosh, I can relate a millions times to what you are putting out there… I have been losing weight with lots of efforts and hard work since the birth of my son 3 years ago (been doing the P90x, started running and read a bunch of books you posted about a while back).. now I’m stable at a size 8 but like you I’m wishing for a size under. So I’m asking the question I’ve been asking myself since I re-started P90X a week ago: is it really about a dress size? Will I really be comfortable in a size 6, will that change anything? Meh, we’ll see!

  • nicole i
    December 4, 2012 at 11:14 am

    oh, i hear you. girl, rock that sequin dress…you will feel fabulous and that makes all the difference. i recently lost a lot of weight and dropped from a 14 to size 8 and i need ed a new dress for a wedding…it kept trying on lbd’s but finally embraced my smaller size and rocked a red lace dress. i never felt better even though it is a lot harder to find an excuse to wear a red lace dress than a lbd. i am ready for sequins next…

    rock the sequins and the candor!

  • Julie
    December 4, 2012 at 11:14 am

    So glad you ordered the dress Nicole, and you’ll look beautiful it in I’m sure.

    • Julie
      December 4, 2012 at 12:46 pm

      *in it

  • Jessica Fly
    December 4, 2012 at 11:14 am

    This was an awesome and honest post! Thank you for that. I also appreciate the message of healthiness over being a certain size. I have been a size 10 since I hit puberty and maintained for the most part, but I have always felt just a smidge overweight. I don’t want to be model thin but I want to feel “athletic” and healthy. Here’s to us reaching that healthy weight just because we want to feel good in our own skin!

  • Meagan
    December 4, 2012 at 11:15 am

    I just reated myself to vintage pin up pictures because I was holding out till I was the right size for them, a size I was comfortable with and I feel like I was putting great things in life on hold, all based on the size of my pants…I’m 32 and I’m finally figuring out that I can’t put things on hold, even if doing them now and not at that goal weight makes me uncomfortable…and it does, some of the pictures I wasn’t super happy with but I’m still glad I did it. I still look smoking in a few of them..:) and I just found out I was actually pregnant with baby #2 that day…so I’m 4 weeks along now and I would be so sad to think I’d have to put them off at least another 2 years trying to reach a goal weight that will seriously not be attained for awhile now.

  • Molly
    December 4, 2012 at 11:16 am

    In the past 2 years I’ve dropped 70 lbs coming down from a size 18 to a 12. I don’t love my body now, but I’m much happier with it, and shopping for clothing is so much more fun. While I want to take off another 20 lbs or so, I’m in that boat with you, it will be gradual and counting calories are not the center of my day anymore.

    I think a lot of women have a warped sense of their own image because we don’t have a concept of what a size X-Y-Z woman actually looks like in real life. Thanks for sharing this, and being brave enough to actually tell us what sizes you’ve worn (as and aside, I always think you look cute in the photos you’ve posted over the years, no matter what your size has been).

  • Emma
    December 4, 2012 at 11:16 am

    I totally admire your dedication to your weight loss goals. I’m someone who doesn’t gain or lose weight very easily – no matter what I do (good or bad) I seem to hover around the same point.

    I will say this: are you healthy? Do you like the way you look? If the answer to both of those questions is yes, I’d say you’re doing very well, regardless of whether you attain your goal.

  • Sandra
    December 4, 2012 at 11:16 am

    I’m so glad you ordered the dress! I think you look wonderful in all of the clothing you choose, and a size 10 is thin to me! I haven’t been a 10 since hitting puberty! There are women all over that would love to be a 10! Wear that party dress with confidence. :)

    • Meagan
      December 4, 2012 at 11:23 am

      10 would be an amazing treat to me too! I was a 12 when I got married and now I hover between 16 and 18 and I’d be a whole new person at 10

  • Holly
    December 4, 2012 at 11:19 am

    It’s always so amazing (and reassuring) to me how all women, even the ones we look up to the most and think are the most confident, struggle with insecurities like this. Thank you for your honesty! You are gorgeous and will no doubt rock the sparkle. :)

  • Laurie
    December 4, 2012 at 11:21 am

    Thanks. Just thanks. xo

  • Kari
    December 4, 2012 at 11:23 am

    I am a 5’11” size 16…. and that’s hard to say… after my babies I got down to my normal size 10-12, but after meningitis twice and steroid treatment, I’ve been sitting at a size 16…. it kills me… but it’s who I am for right now. Hubby can’t get enough.. lol… so at least one of us finds me attractive!

  • Lisa
    December 4, 2012 at 11:26 am

    I love it! Buy it! Enjoy it! And if you get thinner have it altered. Don’t think too much it’s beautiful and you will be beautiful in it! You live one time…… :)

  • Fiona
    December 4, 2012 at 11:27 am

    Unless you are unhappy with your weight, I think you shouldn’t judge by sizes. A size 10 is really not big (and I say this as someone who has always been pretty small). You also had two kids. Before I had a kid, I thought I’d just “bounce back” right away because I’ve always been skinny. It doesn’t happen that way–at least not for me.

    I don’t know if my stomach will ever be truly flat again, but all I can do is work out and eat decently most of the time. I’m healthy and that’s the main thing.

  • Kim
    December 4, 2012 at 11:29 am

    Thanks for sharing this. I think everyone has a size and image that they think is the “real” them. I don’t even know where it comes from. For me, it’s a size 8, just like you (just something about single digits), even thought I’ve spent much more of my adult life NOT that size. At my age now, it would take incredible, sustained effort to get there, more effort than I’m willing to put forth, I know. And I’m pretty happy. But I still have that “right” size somewhere in my head. Time to challenge that, I think.

  • Christina W.
    December 4, 2012 at 11:31 am

    As a person who has been on a weight roller coaster her whole life, I sympathize. I was a size 8 all through highschool, and on my frame a size 8 looks like the exact right weight. Slowly my weight kept creeping upward (which I suspect had something to do with the fact that I wasn’t playing multiple sports anymore. Enforced fitness is the best, amirite?) and now I arrive at 30 as a size 18, and not even a baby to blame it on! Mine is laziness about keeping up an exercise regimen coupled with the fact that I have what is called Adult Selective Eating Disorder. Basically, I eat like a picky six year old because my brain interprets most foods as tasting like poison and engaging my gag reflex. I live on cheese sandwiches and chicken tenders. So, it could be worse! Be thankful that you are blessed with the ability to eat healthy foods when you aren’t sneaking naughty peanut butter crackers! Side note: have you thought about strength training? Just toning up might make you feel like you don’t even need to drop a size. It keeps everything tucked in, if you will. Although I will say that you look amazing and are definitely your own worst critic!

  • andrea @ my kinda perfect
    December 4, 2012 at 11:33 am

    i know exactly where you’re coming from. after years of being overweight, in september, i joined a gym to kick my own ass once and for all.

    there are three things that have helped me get as far as i have, despite being disappointed i haven’t made it further in my weight loss journey.

    1. food journal — writing down every morsel i put in my mouth makes it real.
    2. small, healthy meals — i try to eat 5x per day with a protein, a fat, and a fruit or veggie. i have also learned that veggies are the most important part of the equation — more veggies = more fat burning.
    3. buy a goal outfit — i bought a dress to wear for my fifth anniversary with my boyfriend. that date night was sunday — and the dress fit! will i like the dress more when i lose another 10 pounds? yes. but i also reached a goal.

    maybe you need to buy the sequined dress in a size 8. maybe you need to set the goal and the reward to work for it…?

    good luck in your journey. i’d love to get down to a size 10 by my birthday in may. i’m in between a 16 and 18 now. do-able? i think so! let’s reach our goals girl!!!

    • Sarah
      December 4, 2012 at 1:03 pm

      Hi – you should do whatever works for you, but I don’t think buying clothes for a goal weight is a good idea for most people. Until you see how your body reacts to healthy eating and exercise you have no clue what is a healthy weight for you at this exact time in your life. Don’t try to be an 8 if you are healthy and happy at at 10 b/c it won’t be good for you!

  • Mina
    December 4, 2012 at 11:35 am

    Love it. You sound like me! I don’t particularly hate my body or feel uncomfortable… I’ve just come to the realization that I may or may not ever get myself right back to where I was when I got pregnant (which was my ideal weight). But, I feel comfortable where I am. It’s weird. I love that you got the dress anyway and I’m sure you will look fantastic, as always! Can’t wait to take the Alt class to get some tips from ya! FYI: I curated a Pinterest board for the Alt team called “What to Wear to Alt.” It’s on Alt’s Pinterest (one of their boards). Not sure if you can get some ideas there, but I thought I’d share! Take care and see you soon!


  • Abby
    December 4, 2012 at 11:41 am

    Great post, thank you for sharing. I am so there with you.

  • Cyd
    December 4, 2012 at 11:42 am

    Rock the sequins! You deserve it and you’ll look and feel amazing! I am in the same weight loss boat. At my heaviest I was a size 22, got down to a 12 after years of work and have let myself creep back up to a 14. My goal size is also an 8, although frankly I’ve never seen myself that small so I have no idea what it will feel like…I am hoping this is the year I find out! ;-)

  • Lauren
    December 4, 2012 at 11:45 am

    I can identify with this! In March 2011 I started eating right and exercising in order to loose weight. I lost about 40 pounds and went from a large size 14 to a small 12. I’ve plateaued now and even though I am okay with my size, I can’t get over that I’m not the weight I wanted to be… I keep thinking “I need to loose another 10” pounds. Then I finally realized I will always think I need to loose another 10 pounds. Always. I need to be satisfied or I never will be, which would be sad…

  • Lindsay
    December 4, 2012 at 11:46 am

    I’m a size 24/0 and I struggle with body issues all the time. I’d rather be curvier or bustier or just not shaped like a twig. The best thing about style is that it has no size – you are entitled to wear a sexy sequin dress just as much as I am. And lady, you are gorgeous and so is your family! Thank you for sharing.

  • Caroline @ The Feminist Housewife
    December 4, 2012 at 11:47 am

    I can relate to the weight fluctuations that having two kids close together bring…I feel like I’ve been waiting for years to buy anything at all. But I think that maybe I should just enjoy the now – and who I am at this moment and go buy myself a damn outfit. Teehee.

    So glad you go the dress. I know you’ll rock it. Post a photo!! = )

  • Cara
    December 4, 2012 at 11:48 am

    Beautiful post… I am right there with you.

  • Chloe Moon
    December 4, 2012 at 11:56 am

    That was the most honest post I’ve read in a long time. I am so happy you ordered that dress! I do the same thing hope to be smaller to buy this and that, but I have to accept myself as I am. You do roller derby? You cool before but now your extra cool! Best wishes at your class at the roller derby and I hope you love your dress!! =)

  • Loren
    December 4, 2012 at 11:58 am

    Good for you! The dress is gorgeous and will look great on you! The dress is super classy looking too.

    I bought myself a ridiculous sequined dress for New Years a couple years ago. And it was seriously the best decision. You’ll love it.

  • Krissy
    December 4, 2012 at 12:08 pm

    Nicole, that dress is beautiful.

    I love reading your blog and seeing your style posts because you ARE wearing a normal size and I can see how stylish things work on a real lady.

    I never understood, growing up, how my mother had 5 different sizes of clothes in her closet, but now I do because I have at least 3 sizes of wardrobe and I’m only 30. It’s hard to focus on being healthy instead of caring about a size or weight goal, especially when some of the clothes I love don’t fit anymore. (When I look at these closet editing charts and get to the “does it fit” question, I gulp. Uh, no.

    Thanks for the honest post, I hope you buy the sparkly dress!

  • smith207
    December 4, 2012 at 12:09 pm

    Size 12 here more than a year post-baby and Size 8 is also my ideal goal.

    Thank you for sharing! My philosophy is when I am ready and motivated it will happen. Right now, I am overwhelmed with other areas of my life and just not there yet. Food makes me feel better on tough days :(

  • Chedva
    December 4, 2012 at 12:11 pm

    You hit a chord here, to say the least. I used to be size 8 (even 6, right before my wedding) and felt so fat I’d only wear clothes that “hid” me (like skirt suits and blazers) and never, say, a fun dress. After I had my son, my weight fluctuated a lot, but I never felt as fat as I did at size 6. I actually did wear a beautiful DVF sequin dress to my brother’s wedding 2 years ago (gotta find an opportunity to wear it again). But now that I’m back to trying to get to a healthy-for-me weight, I feel really bad buying new clothes for my currently 16-18 size figure. I did get a beautiful pencil skirt online at Black Friday (from J.Crew), just because I feel like the only clothes that fit me right now are old t shirts and skirts and I want to feel pretty (and have appropriate clothes for meetings). I keep holding off trying on that skirt, fearing it wouldn’t fit.

  • Shauna
    December 4, 2012 at 12:12 pm

    All these comments make me wonder how we ever got here, like slaves to a size.

    My life has been a yoyo of weight gain and loss. A year ago I decided to stop playing the game. Then I promptly went on a diet when my son announced he was getting married, so I wouldn’t be the fat lady in the picture. But I hated myself for it.

    Just buy the damn dress and be so glad you are alive and shimmering with that life. You’ve always looked stunning to me.

    Thanks for your post and your honesty!

  • Sarah
    December 4, 2012 at 12:20 pm

    Thanks so much for this great post. It really spoke to me and echoes the issues I have faced with weight loss/gain over the years.

  • Sarah S
    December 4, 2012 at 12:51 pm

    I know where you’re coming from – after two kids, I’m finally down to my pre-baby weight, and even a little below it, which now has me at a size 12, but headed towards a 10. Problem is, I haven’t been a 10 in about as many years, and don’t have any clothes in that size. You would think clothes shopping in a new smaller size would feel great, but having dealt with weight stuff all my life, I have no confidence that I’ll stay in this size. I just assume I’ll put the weight back on, like I always have.

  • Heather
    December 4, 2012 at 12:53 pm

    There is so much I want to say about this!!

    When I first started blogging, I was surprised by how attractive, even model-like, the field of successful bloggers seemed to be. Sometimes it feels like just another iteration of the unattainable-magazine thing, which seems a bit at odds with the ethos of the blogosphere, don’t you think? And then, there are bloggers like you. I LOVE that you are “regular” in your size/looks and that you have such good personal style and do wardrobe posts and all of that. And I love that they are just fashion posts, not ascribed in any way to style for girls of a certain size or shape. It feels to be like a good equalizer, like style is for everyone who wants it, no big deal.

    So there’s that. :)

    On the personal front, I can relate to your weight struggles. I have been up and down and always felt like it was sort of just magic. A few months ago I decided to take control of it and started using my fitness pal (online and on my phone) to track my calorie intake and exercise. It helped me identify my bad habits around food (I mostly knew what they were–helloo, finishing my kids plates–just didn’t know how bad they were) and helped me make better choices. It was a little work in the beginning to weigh my food etc in order to re-set my ideas about portion size and to better understand high-value calories, but now it’s easy, and I lost 15 pounds in 2 months almost through eating habits alone.

    The other thing that happened is I started to re-set my expectations about my goal weight. My original goal was to lose 30 pounds, but halfway there, I think that might be too much. I mention this because I think part of the calculation of a goal weight should be how much work it will be to maintain. I’d rather be healthy a size 10 without stress than constantly stressing to maintain a size 8. Obviously it is a personal thing, but I was surprised to have this revelation recently.

    Okay, I may have gone on just a little too long! I will just say, I think you look great, and I love what you’re doing here–including sharing this post.

  • Karen A
    December 4, 2012 at 1:07 pm

    What a great post! I start stressing about the same things around this time of year, supplemented by failed New Years resolutions to keep healthy and lose weight. This post is a great inspiration to start loving your body.

  • Danielle
    December 4, 2012 at 1:16 pm

    I can relate to this so much. Last year, in November, I had a baby. I dropped all my baby weight and a little more by May 2012 and had bought this stunning Jessica Simpson sequence dress to wear to a wedding. I felt confident in it for a moment, then I got home and started second guessing myself. I was still showing the lumps and bumps from pregnancy. I bought a spanx and it sort of helped, but I was still not seeing what I wanted. I thought about returning it, but didn’t. I loved it too much. I still haven’t woren it, but I have now started to realize I may not lose the weight I want to any time too soon. I have to embrass where I am now and not settle because of it.

  • May
    December 4, 2012 at 1:20 pm

    Dear Nicole – thanks for the honest post. You’re an inspiration to me and so many others and in so many ways, and obviously lovely inside and out. As a young mom in the same age range, I really appreciate your love of all things lovely, including making yourself lovely, which you do and did at any size. Thanks for being a model and encouragement to all your readers! xo.

  • Brittany LeSueur
    December 4, 2012 at 1:26 pm

    You are a doll and such an inspiration! I am happy to hear you got the dress because you will be a total knockout! Can’t wait to see it!

  • Carly
    December 4, 2012 at 1:31 pm

    BUY THE DRESS! Sequined dresses won’t be in fashion forever. Next year you can have it taken in and wear it as a size 8 :)

  • Kate
    December 4, 2012 at 1:32 pm

    Thanks for this vulnerable post, Nicole. You’re beautiful! I’m sure you’ll look lovely in the gorgeous sequined dress!

  • Valerie
    December 4, 2012 at 1:36 pm

    I’m glad you bought the dress. I’m going through something very similar… I just stepped on a scale for the first time in about 6 months and I weigh 174. I’m just barely a size 10, more towards a size 12 if I’m being honest with myself. About 4 years ago I weighed 143 (for one magical day!) and I was a size 4/6. But the crazy stuff that I did to get that size… I was basically eating 600 calories a day and running 4-6 miles every other day. Nuts! My goal is a size 8, but if I can keep myself at a 10 (I’ve been up to a size 16), I think I can live with that. I stopped buying nice clothes for a while because I didn’t want to buy things that weren’t in my goal size, but my mom reminded me recently that tailors exist for a reason and I can always have my clothes taken in (what a nice problem to have). In any case, congrats on the work you’ve done to rid yourself of the baby weight and as hard as it is, try to remember that sometimes being one size larger is worth not going nuts about it!

  • Becky
    December 4, 2012 at 2:00 pm

    Thank you for posting this. I have the same reservations and then never end up having nice things to wear.

  • kate
    December 4, 2012 at 2:08 pm

    Nicole, I have been following your blog since 2007 and have never commented before. Today that changes. I want you to know that you inspire me in so many ways, as I am sure you do for so many other people too. Your hard work and endless creativity never cease to amaze me. Having never met you this will sound like a funny thing to say but I am so proud of you for all you have accomplished, please never forget that there is so much more to you as a person than numbers on a scale. You are more than that to all of us and we adore you. I have no doubt in my mind that you will rock that gorgeous dress and can’t wait to see the photos. Stay awesome, stay you.

  • Meghann S.C.
    December 4, 2012 at 2:10 pm

    Glad you bought the dress. Life is short and unpredictable, and you shouldn’t wait to rock the sequins – wearing sequins at 60 is an entire different (no less exciting) thing ;)

    Maybe 10 is your happy weight? I’m naturally a 10-12 (depending on the cut, I’m top heavy :P), but was an 8 in high school so I understand the appeal of that number. I worked my butt off to get down a size for my wedding. I was really happy with the pictures, but man I felt like such a beast during the weight loss period. I would avoid social gatherings for fear of treats, spend too much time in the gym, and agonize over food choices. My husband was not a huge fan of this version of me (I believe they call this state hangry). I realized about a month after the wedding that 8 was just not natural for me and that a life without the occasional glass of wine, without bread, without happy hour with the girls, was not the life for me. The emotional cost of size 8 was NOT worth it, so I embraced a toned 10 as my size and it really lifted an emotional burden. And who knows, maybe 8 will work for you, but I feel like us curvier ladies get too attached to the number and the allure of the single digits.

  • Licia
    December 4, 2012 at 2:29 pm

    You will rock the sparkle. I know it.
    I just saw a great way sequins during the day or for a more informal evening:

  • Bonnie Morscher
    December 4, 2012 at 2:44 pm

    You look great and you will look and feel wonderful in that dress! Don’t let yourself be held back by doubts.

  • Adriane /// The A & B Stories
    December 4, 2012 at 2:54 pm

    Oh Nicole, I love your honesty. When I met you at Blog Podium in Toronto you were STUNNING, and you could have passed for a size 6 if it helps ;)

    Since having my son my weight has never been what I want it to be, but I too am a terrible eater (chocolate, ugh). This post was a great read for me, I need to think about my health goals!

  • Kathryn
    December 4, 2012 at 3:08 pm

    I’m glad you bought the dress. I have always found it rather inspirational that no matter what your size you put photos of yourself out there. I’ve been editing myself out of photos for years, pretty much since I left my dancer body far behind. Now, particularly with Emmeth, I feel the need to work towards my own acceptance so I can help her accept herself. I’m no where near there yet, but seeing others accept themselves (or at least seem to, I know we all always mask our vulnerabilities) has been inspiring.

  • Alison
    December 4, 2012 at 3:17 pm

    I really, really loved this post. Thank you for your honesty. As someone who is not model thin, I can relate entirely. There are certain styles and shapes that I don’t even think to try on, which can be very limiting at times. I did just buy this skirt ( though, which is a bit of a leap for me and which makes this post even more timely. Happy holidays – go rock those sequins!!

  • Liz
    December 4, 2012 at 3:23 pm

    I struggled with the same thing for many years, although not because of pregnancy. Rather a stressful job and bad habits. BUT, I had a realization one day: women feel sadness and self-loathing over this stuff when they are SO much more than a number. Here’s how I wrote it on my blog: “Sadness? That is for when people die. Or when you’re sick. Or when you break up with someone. Or when you’re struggling with your job. Or when your favorite show is cancelled. Sadness is not an emotion you should equate with looking in the mirror.”

    Anyway, I get you and it’s all chronicled here in one of the scariest things I have ever done… told the Internet exactly how much I weighed:

    Be happy. Love your body. Love yourself. Always know: it’s a journey not a destination.

    • lsaspacey
      December 6, 2012 at 3:43 pm

      Wow, Liz, that was a powerful blog post. Congrats to you! Also, what an amazing quote, I know a few people I’d like to send that to, however, I don’t think they’re quite there yet to hear it.

  • Laura Parke
    December 4, 2012 at 4:29 pm

    Nicole, I admire your honesty and bravery to share such details on an intimate topic. go you!!

  • melinda KE
    December 4, 2012 at 4:52 pm

    Nicole, good for you for ordering that sequined dress! This was a great post and I’m so happy you decided to post it instead of just listing the dresses and links. I’m guilty of doing the same thing. I put on twenty pounds about two years ago, a combination of working a full-time and part-time job, (both desk jobs) and being put on a certain medication. I noticed with the weight gain I’ve stopped dressing up and it seems like every time I see a pretty dress that I want to buy I tell myself to wait until I’ve lost the weight. Well, after two years of trying to lose the weight you could say that I’m feeling a bit stuck! For what it’s worth, I think you always look fabulous so I’m sure you’re going to rock that sequined dress!

    • Making it Lovely
      December 5, 2012 at 12:17 pm

      Thanks. I’m glad I did post this, though it would have been much easier to just post the dresses with links.

  • Catherine
    December 4, 2012 at 4:57 pm

    Oh Nicole, this post brought tears to my eyes. When I saw the title, I got all excited because I knew you were going to talk about the Alt Class, which I’m so excited to take. You are so beautiful, you look incredible, and you can rock any dress with sequins! Seriously, size is so relative these days. I can wear a small on top, but my larger thighs and rear require a much larger size, anywhere from an 8-12, depending on where I’m shopping and who makes it. I quit worrying about the number and just go for what looks good on me. You always look fabulous, and you are teaching a class on how to dress, so if that’s not confirmation, I don’t know what is. Thank you for revealing this insecurity, because we’ve all been there.

    • Making it Lovely
      December 5, 2012 at 2:34 pm

      I’m smaller on top too, so I might wear an 8 on the top and a 12 on the bottom, depending on the brand. I’ll buy what looks good, regardless of size, but I still had a goal size in mind as a goal.

      (And thanks. I’ll see you in class!)

  • Jennifer Rodgers
    December 4, 2012 at 5:00 pm

    Thank you for putting this out there. I struggle with these issues as well and am similarly sized: size 12 at marriage, size 14 after baby #1, size 16 after baby #2. I’ve since lost 22lbs. and am back to a size 14. But I still struggle…with the self loathing, hiding myself in clothing and not feeling comfortable in my own skin/clothes. I wonder how to find peace with myself at 5’3″ 160lbs. For some reason, this continues to elude me.

    • Making it Lovely
      December 5, 2012 at 2:54 pm

      I’m the same weight right now too, just two inches taller. I feel good, but I’d hoped to be a little smaller by now.

  • Amy
    December 4, 2012 at 5:49 pm

    Thank you so being so candid and GOOD FOR you-wear that dress with pride!

  • Carlene
    December 4, 2012 at 6:17 pm

    And I was just thinking (i’ve followed your blog for a few years) how awesome you look and how I would love to look your size and be able to wear what you do and look that good. I’m a 14. You are beautiful and look so healthy.

  • Megan @ Two Live Colorfully
    December 4, 2012 at 6:59 pm

    This is a great post! It’s really nice to see honesty from bloggers that I really look up to. I’ve been in a constant battle with my weight since high school, so even though it’s a personal thing for everyone, it’s kind of nice to know that someone out there is in it with me!

    Thank you for sharing Nicole!!!

  • norah
    December 4, 2012 at 7:05 pm

    1. I really love it when you have emotional blogs (not that I love it when you are sad).
    2. Life is hard. Being a woman is hard. Being a mother is hard. Having to deal with everything that is handed to you is hard. The self imposed (socially imposed?) numbers based goal weights suck. I’m with you. I lost 30 lbs this year…now its only 20. I don’t know if I should buy clothes, I don’t know if I should get rid of too big clothes. I get down on myself about gaining some weight back, thinking if I hadn’t fallen off the wagon, I’d be a size 6 by now, as I shove chips in my face. But when I get down like that, I think “Hey, I’m still in a better place then I was last January, so screw it. I’ll try to start again and be better but I deserve to feel proud of myself.” So do you.

    • Making it Lovely
      December 5, 2012 at 5:11 pm

      “Not that I love it when you are sad.”
      Ha, that made me chuckle. I’ll try to be more angsty then, OK?

      I’d be at my goal by now too, if only I tried harder. Was more disciplined. Ate better. Worked out more. Was better at running. Etc, etc. It’s so hard to not think like that. We should be proud of what we’ve done though, you’re right.

  • Kristín
    December 4, 2012 at 7:24 pm

    Loved this post Nicole, thanks for sharing. I’m in the same boat, I’ve lost a lot of weight since having my first child in Feb 2011 but haven’t quite been able to reach my ideal weight but in the last couple of weeks I’ve been slowly deciding to just be happy with myself as I am, thanks for pushing me further along the way. :)

    PS you don’t have to give up peanut butter, just the nasty kinds, buy organic peanut butter with only peanuts and salt on the ingredient list (not palm oil, it’s really fattening), it’s more expensive but oh so worth it. – It’s also full of good fat, fat that helps you burn the bad fat. I have it occasionally with apple or banana slices for a snack or dessert, yummi!

    PPS the same goes for organic almond butter (with only almonds and salt).

    You can even make them yourself if you have a powerful food processor – OK, that’s all!

    • Making it Lovely
      December 5, 2012 at 5:12 pm

      Oh, I love the worst stuff. Jif is my BFF.

  • jackie jade
    December 4, 2012 at 7:27 pm

    So brave of your to share your story here! We have all struggled with our weight and/or looks in one way or another and there is always that pressure that we aren’t “done.” I’m so happy you ordered the dress and you will be fabulous in it!!

  • Maria @ Inspiration Affirmation
    December 4, 2012 at 7:50 pm

    I’m so glad you ordered the dress. First of all, I think you look so beautiful. But at the same time, I know what it’s like to have people tell you that and not feel totally confident in your own size, shape, etc. When it came to my weight, my mom always told me that it is important to dress for the body we have now, even if we want to be smaller or lose weight. It’s part of that feeling-good process, you know? You have done an incredible thing for yourself — you have gotten healthy. It’s time to celebrate that, and this time, that means wearing a little sparkle. Thanks so much for sharing this with us.

  • Dawn
    December 4, 2012 at 8:28 pm

    sigh… i know…. i know exactly how you feel. i was a 6, then i ballooned up to a 12 when i was pregnant and now i am floating around a 14/16 TWO YEARS after the birth of my son. yes, i ate everything in sight. god, i still do. i gained ALL my pregnancy weight in the first THREE months of my preganancy and only lost 25-30 lbs after he was born. now i go up and down, +10, -10 every month or so. my husband’s xmas office party is rapidly approaching next weekend and i have NO desire to go and no dress to speak of. i am so uncomfortable in my own skin. the thought of going shopping for a dress brings me to tears.

    • Making it Lovely
      December 5, 2012 at 4:55 pm

      I gained 13 pounds in one month when I was pregnant with August. I’m not sure how the hell I accomplished that.

  • Katie
    December 4, 2012 at 8:31 pm

    love it when you open up to us. you are a gem.

  • julie
    December 4, 2012 at 9:37 pm

    You’ll rock those sequins, no matter what size you are. Thank you for posting this.

  • Lindsay
    December 4, 2012 at 9:47 pm

    With all my weight loss and body image struggles, I can say 2 things with major confidence:
    1. it’s about dressing for the body that you have, not the body that you want to have. Me squeezing into the jeans that I wanted to fit into for all those years? BIG MISTAKE. If you get a faboosh sequin dress that’s a 10 or a 16, who the heck cares what size it is? Cut out the tag. Plus, sizes are so wonky, you can be a 2 somewhere and a 10 somewhere else. If it looks good, it looks good.

    And speaking of looking good,

    2. I’m gonna come out and call BS on you being anything over an itty bitty 8 after getting all huggy on you at mighty last week! There is nothing to you, lady! And heck, maybe that’s because you’re dressing to suit your body (which really, I still have no idea how to do, but everyone TELLS me I should do it. I just know it involves not getting muffin tops when I put my pants on) but you looked GREAT and exuded confidence. As Derreck told us, CONFIDENCE and PANACHE!

    Those and a sequin dress– in any size– will take you far, regardless of the number on the tag. <3

    • Making it Lovely
      December 5, 2012 at 4:57 pm

      This is me, on the right, dancing my face off at Camp Mighty. I don’t think I look bad, yet I feel bad when I think about not having met my goal. Silly.

  • meenal@maison marigold
    December 4, 2012 at 9:53 pm

    you go girl!! rock all those sequins! xx meenal

  • notrachel
    December 4, 2012 at 9:57 pm

    OMG, this is exactly where i am right now. a long battle with depression and subsequent guilt/insecurity had me almost weighing 200lbs. i’m down a little over 20lbs so far and was looking for something sparkly to wear to an annual dinner party that my church has at Christmas. haven’t found the right thing yet (and your dress is lovely but a little out of my price range), but i’m still hopeful. sparkles are a severe departure from the sweats/t-shirts that i’d worn like a uniform for a years. sparkles were for other people…skinny ppl who wanted attention. i wanted to hide, to be invisible. it’s not that i’m skinny, now, or that i want attention. it’s just that i’ve changed and i’m proud of that.

    also, i’ve decided there’s nothing more arbitrary than clothing sizes. i have pants size 8, 10 and 12 while a 14 by some brands doesn’t fit and can where a small shirt from one company and a large from another. it’s maddening just because i don’t always want to have to try something on to see if it’s too big/too small. shopping still isn’t really a favorite thing to do.

  • francie
    December 4, 2012 at 10:29 pm

    Thank you so much for writing this post. Your blog is lovely! I read a few blogs, and sometimes I think there is a blog “voice” and they all start sounding and looking the same after a while, and writing about the same stuff. But this post sounds like you, is on something we all think about and don’t talk about often enough. So thank you!

    I did the Whole Living cleanse last year, and bc of it, I was really able to take a look at the role that food plays in my life. For example, snacking for me really wasn’t about being hungry, but about taking a break for myself during the day taking care of a baby and the house work. So I was able to stop that bad habit as a result of the cleanse. Cleaning up my diet wasn’t really about weight for me, but about feeling good (also it felt good to set a goal and accomplish it). The first four days were difficult (I threw up on day two! but if you read about the cleanse stuff, that is supposedly a result of the toxins built up and being cleansed out), and I followed all the directions to a T (even the journaling and exercising). At the end of it (three to four weeks), I had lost a lot of weight, which I was happy about, but I felt better that I’d done it not to lose weight, but to take care of myself. Plus, most of their recipes were really tasty!

  • Kristen
    December 4, 2012 at 10:56 pm

    I could say so much about this post! I can definitely relate to how you feel. I am glad you bought the dress! Wearing sequins is so much fun, I wore them when I was big and I still wear them now. And don’t worry, if you do get down to a size 8 you can just get it altered!

  • Darcy
    December 5, 2012 at 12:32 am

    That dress is beautiful and you will look beautiful in it!

  • Joey
    December 5, 2012 at 1:33 am

    I definitely feel you on this one! Last Xmas I was a size 22/24 and I’m down to a 14 now and really want to be a 10/12. I’ve always loved clothes and dressing up but it’s frustrating when it seems like all your clothes are too big or clothes you want are too small. I’m invited to a fancy holiday party and I ordered a partially sequined dress too!

  • Alisha
    December 5, 2012 at 1:45 am

    I admire your honesty! I was a skinny thing growing up, and a size 6 until right before I got married. After our wedding, I developed some health problems (thyroid, chronic fatigue, etc.), and now I’m a size 18. It really sucks! Especially because cheap, cute clothes are hard to find in my size. I say go for the cute dress and enjoy it!

  • Michelle Horton
    December 5, 2012 at 1:56 am

    To me, you were the most confidently dressed woman at Camp Mighty! I think you always look fabulous. :)

    • Making it Lovely
      December 5, 2012 at 5:14 pm

      Aw, thank you. I’m so glad you were there this year.

  • Nicole RJ
    December 5, 2012 at 6:06 am

    Why do we put ourselves through such misery over an arbitrary number? I’ve just started working on getting rid of the ‘baby weight’ that I regained a year after my baby was born and would love to rock a sequin dress… Good for you for ordering the dress! I’ve never met you, but I’ve been following your blog for years now and I think you look fabulous and should rock your sequin dress with confidence!

  • Audrey
    December 5, 2012 at 7:37 am

    I am on a glitter and sequins kick lately, but I’m plus sized and always have been. I don’t know if I’m comfortable enough in my skin to pull off a full-on sequin ensemble, so I’ve started searching for glitzy and shiny accent pieces to wear with the clothes I’m comfortable in. Thanks for being so vulnerable in this post. I feel like women, regardless of size, can really relate to what you’ve said here.

  • Sandy
    December 5, 2012 at 8:37 am

    Good for you! As someone who isn’t likely ever to get down to a size 10, you have to dress the body you have. And, lately, I’ve just been trying to fake it until it feels normal.

    You always look awesome, and I am sure that you will rock the dress. Can’t wait to see pictures!

  • momcounsel
    December 5, 2012 at 9:21 am

    found you through young house love – i had to comment there and here. i love everything you’ve done – so close to my aesthetic. beautiful home!

  • Natalie
    December 5, 2012 at 10:03 am

    You are so right!!! After some mean comments on my blog I wrote a post about how the meds I am on have had me bloated and 2 sizes bigger; and I got the sweetest email from another blogger telling me that it was nice of me to be so honest/personal but that I should never feel like I had to explain the way I looked. And she’s right, being healthy is important, especially with little ones around, but shouldn’t we just smile and be happy with what we’ve got and stop waiting for that smaller size? Your post just reminded me that I need to really quit explaining to others and just buy the size that fits me right now….

    You are lovely, remember that.

    Natalie a big admirer

    • Making it Lovely
      December 5, 2012 at 5:17 pm

      I can’t believe someone would leave mean comments about someone’s size. That’s terrible – sorry you had to experience it.

  • Aubrey
    December 5, 2012 at 10:48 am

    You’re dress is on sale! 45% off. And, it’s a beautiful classic :)

  • Didi
    December 5, 2012 at 10:55 am

    You know, I think you are looking great. Last photo I saw of you I thought “she’s lots a TON of weight”. Just wanted to say you do so much and you do it so well. You WILL attain your weight goal and proper eating. I’d figured because you lost so much weight you *were* eating properly, until I’d read your post today. With all that you do it must be difficult to cook up a storm of items which are both pleasing to the palate and healthy, too. But, you will. I have great faith in you! Such an inspiring person, you are.

    • Making it Lovely
      December 5, 2012 at 5:19 pm

      I did lose a ton of weight — 50 pounds since having August! It’s ridiculous to beat myself up over not having lost 10 more.

      I don’t eat terribly, but I have a weakness for chocolate and peanut butter — one that I’m all to keen to give in to.

  • Jessica
    December 5, 2012 at 11:10 am

    Thanks for your honesty, Nicole. It’s so frustrating that so many of us (all of us?!) relate to this, because we have so many more interesting things to think about than our weight/figures/looks but it is such a hard cycle to escape. I really want to set a better example for my kids (two girls) with how they view their bodies, but I fear I am doing a poor job. When I see someone else express insecurity over their size, I can immediately say “hold up, you look fabulous and are gorgeous” and mean it with my whole heart. So why can’t I view myself this way?? I wish I could see my figure as yet another thing that links me to the beautiful women in my family and not just for the way it makes me look in jeans.

  • Mona
    December 5, 2012 at 11:13 am

    I’ve been following your blog since I first saw you on Apartment Therapy. You always look great no matter what your size and I love your blog because of your positive posts and great taste in all things gorgeous.

    I’m so glad you opened up about your insecurities. It makes me feel better about myself – it really does. To know I’m not alone. I am a size 14. I just lost 10 lbs but I still need to drop another 40-50 lbs to get to my goal weight!

    So, I bought a gorgeous sequined cardigan to wear to the office Christmas party. I’m going to rock it, just like I’m sure you will rock your sequin dress. I can’t wait to see the photos!

    • Making it Lovely
      December 5, 2012 at 5:20 pm

      Go and rock it! I’ll do the same.

  • Bethany
    December 5, 2012 at 11:13 am

    Good for you dressing the body you have now instead of holding off to dress some ‘future you’.
    That’s one I’m trying to practice too. It seems hard so far, but worth it.
    P.S. yes, reminders of current body incredibleness are worth it too! (Grew and birthed TWO babies! Creative artist woman here, style ish mama, umm hello roller derby!) yes you know all this, just sayin’

  • Bethany
    December 5, 2012 at 11:14 am

    P.S. Hope you bought dress in your current size! It’s gorgeous! And you’re gorgeous! Unite!

  • Imogen
    December 5, 2012 at 11:17 am

    I absolutely loved reading this post Nicole. You expressed a lot of what I and others feel. I too hope to continue living a healthy lifestyle and lose some weight, but I also want to look good now and will continue to buy clothes that suit my body/make me feel great and surround myself with people that are supportive. Great writing!

  • Ali
    December 5, 2012 at 12:14 pm

    I think you are beautiful, fit, and have a terrific sense of style!

    I’m so impressed with your weight loss and healthy life style! I’m a size 18 and just at 200 lbs. Your post gives me hope that I too will one day loose a a size or two and possibly wear sequins while adding to my health! :)

    Enjoy your party dress!

    ~ Ali

  • littleoakcreations
    December 5, 2012 at 12:33 pm

    Hi Nicole!
    I’m over here from Young House Love – I have never read your blog before until right now, and I was just coming to check out more of your house… but this post stopped me dead in my tracks. I am in the same weight size boat you were – a heavy 18, but not because of pregnancy. I was a size 12 in high school and after being miserable for so long (I’ve been out of high school for 7 years now and gradually gained through college) I am beginning to take my weight back and I would love to be in a 10-12 range. This post was incredibly inspiring. We should sparkle no matter what our size, but I’m ready to get healthy AND sparkle. Thank you for this post!

  • Grace@ Sense and Simplicity
    December 5, 2012 at 12:53 pm

    I just heard on the news this morning about two study groups that ate the same and exercised the same (although how they controlled that and monitored that, I’m not sure) and the only difference between the groups was that one group got 5 1/2 hours of sleep a night and the other got 8 hours. The group that got 8 hours of sleep a night lost 5 lbs more in the same length of time as the other group. Interesting, eh?

    • Making it Lovely
      December 5, 2012 at 5:26 pm

      I’ve heard that too. I definitely don’t get enough sleep. Six hours is a good night for me.

  • Some Christmas Decorating | Making it Lovely
    December 5, 2012 at 1:14 pm

    […] It Some Christmas Decorating December 5 Bookmark or Share 0 comments So. Speaking of sequins, they’re featured prominently in my home for the holidays.The house may be photographed for a […]

  • casacaudill
    December 5, 2012 at 2:35 pm

    I have always struggled with weight and self-image. In high school I had a Britney Spears body, but I was anorexic and unhealthy. In college I discovered a love of food and gained A LOT of weight. After college I’ve tried every diet out there, but have been unable to lose the weight permanently. When I came down with serious digestive issues, my doctor advised that I eat what pretty much is the Paleo diet. It was great because I lost 30 pounds in the course of a year, but I wasn’t better or more healthy, and I was actually worried about the amount of red meat I was eating. I ended up going back to my previous eating habits (which includes all natural and whole foods, incidentally) and within just a couple of months all of the weight was back. It’s depressing, but at the same time, I’m otherwise generally very happy. So it’s kind of a trade off. I look terrible in certain clothes, but I just have to accept that. I’m 35 years old. I shouldn’t be wearing juniors styles anyhow. :-) (At least that’s what I tell myself.) What I’m enjoying about the clothing industry is that people are starting to understand that women are a viable market and that we want stylish, well-made clothes. Sadly, they’re more expensive.

    For what it’s worth, I think you look great and I’m sure you’d rock a sequin dress because you have great taste and you’d choose one that looks great and tasteful on a woman.

  • Jenn
    December 5, 2012 at 2:51 pm

    I don’t know why it’s taken me so long to find your blog. You’re wonderful!

    I admire your honesty and can completely relate to the idea of waiting to buy what you want until some magical number says it’s okay. I keep trying to tell myself that you can’t hold back on fun until things seem “perfect”. You have to celebrate the steps it takes to reach a larger goal, otherwise all of the fun and magic seems to disappear rather quickly.

    Thank you for sharing!
    xo, Jenn (your newest follower)

  • Hannah Jade
    December 5, 2012 at 2:56 pm

    Thank you, sincerely, for this. You’re dead on the money and it’s so comforting to know I’m not the only one that thinks like this x

  • Shana
    December 5, 2012 at 3:22 pm

    What a great post, so glad to hear other women think this way. I did the same thing….held back on buying new wardrobe until I reached that “goal” weight. Lost 15 lbs but didn’t feel I was quite there…so no clothes… then I gained most of it back. I think if I had upgraded to clothes that fit my current weight I would’ve been much more motivated to keep it off! Now I’m back at it and aiming to get back down to at least where I was 15 lbs ago. Good luck with your weight loss/maintenance. I know it’s tough!

  • Julia @ This Idiot's Guide
    December 5, 2012 at 3:51 pm

    This is my first visit to your blog, and I appreciate your honesty in this post! As you can see from the hundred or so comments you’ve already gotten, you are not alone! I am exactly where you are – a size 10 but always hoping to be a solid 8 instead (which I once was, and have struggled to get back to). I have no babies to blame, either, just a love of junk food. I’ve also been in a similar place as you, refusing to buy new clothes and “waste the money” when I’m expecting/hoping to be a smaller size soon. But what I’ve found is that remaining in old, outdated, worn clothes because you refuse to buy new ones only breeds further loathing of your body because inevitably nothing looks good after a while. Buying new clothes doesn’t mean you don’t still intend to get to your ideal size, it just means you are willing to continue to treat yourself kindly and generously in the meantime! And while you wait to get down to your ideal size, feeling fabulous in new clothes that fit right can give you a boost of confidence and make being just a tad bigger than you’d like a bit more tolerable. Plus, you can always get clothes altered!! With just a few extra bucks and a good tailor that sequined dress can follow you around from size to size. :)

  • Mrs. LIAYF
    December 5, 2012 at 5:40 pm

    Nicole – thank you for sharing this. I think women are really, really hard on themselves and how they look. I, too, am finally down to a size 10 after having my son (who is now 5 1/2). I have that last nagging 10-15 pounds to get rid of, and have been hesitant to invest in any nice clothing until I reach a healthier size.

    Did I mention my son is 5 1/2!!!!???? That means, no new clothes for 5 1/2 years!!! I think I need to just let myself buy pretty things now and to feel pretty now. If I found a beautiful sequin dress in a size 10 that looked nice, I would buy it and then find a good tailor/alterations person when I lost the last few pounds. :)

  • Becky
    December 5, 2012 at 5:52 pm

    What a brave post! I have been there, Nicole. I have been an 8, a 16, and everything in between. Now in a comfortable relationship, I find myself at the top end of that spectrum and looking for a wedding dress. Even though I’m the happiest I’ve ever been, my current size is keeping me from enjoying what should be a wonderful experience. I am dreading going dress shopping and embarrassed to take anyone with me. Your post was exactly what I needed to read today. Enjoy your pretty dress!

  • colleen maia
    December 5, 2012 at 8:32 pm

    When my daughters were approaching the middle school years, we got rid of the weight scale in our home. Young girls (and even their mothers) don’t need to be weighing themselves and fretting about a couple pounds up or down. Eat right, exercise, and your natural weight set-point will find itself.

  • Nicole
    December 5, 2012 at 9:58 pm

    This post couldn’t have come at a better time for me. I just started trying to lose weight a month ago on Weight Watchers after becoming almost disgusted with the way I looked. I have struggled with body image for as long as I can remember. I lost weight in university because I wasn’t eating and gained it all back a couple years later. Now, I’m trying to focus on my health. I’ve lost 7 lbs so far, and I’m cooking and enjoying food more than ever. Don’t get me wrong, this week has been hard as the holiday treats have started coming into my office. I got a little carried away with chocolates and candy this week and I feel anxious about looking at the scale on my weigh-in day on Sunday, but I’m trying to remind myself that this is a lifestyle change and it won’t happen all at once. A major motivator for me is looking better in clothes. I’ve struggled with finding a personal style I’m comfortable with because I’m so self-conscious. I can’t wait to find my personal style like you have. Thanks for sharing this. I really needed to read this tonight.

  • salley
    December 6, 2012 at 8:25 am

    Over the last two years I lost 50 pounds, and one of the things that kept and keeps me going was learning to treat myself well no matter what size I am. Ironically, sometimes buying, wearing, and feeling awesome in the size 12 dress gives you either the boost of feel goodness to do whatever you want- whether its finally accomplishing your goal of a size 8 or finally being psyched that you look awesome right now as a size 12.

    My other thought: I’m now pregnant with twins, and am back over 200 pounds which is both necessary to build my babies and also a little disheartening. Yesterday a church secretary told me I was a lovely, beautiful person, and then later someone on the street said they thought they’d recently seen me on the Jerry Springer show. I guess nobody is ever going to be able to hold up an accurate mirror for me, so I better get on learning how to do so myself.

    I’m so glad you bought the dress! XO

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